Too Possessive about your love? Tips that will help!

Posted on May 3, 2010

Kishore CS:

Every relationship’s strength is determined by one shared feeling, trust. It is the secret to every happy couple today. Having faith in your partner can solve so many problems. Every individual needs his/her space. If this is not given, he/she feels a little congested in the relationship, and that’s where the lying begins. One needs time alone, and if this not given then he/she makes up excuses not to meet their partner. On the contrary, if everyone’s private space is respected, the question of lying never occurs. It makes it easier for the partner to be honest.

You must never feel insecure when your partner is not with you. Insecurity is a clear sign of lack of trust. This could lead to spying, bad thoughts, etc. When your partner finds out that you have been up to all this, he/she would feel hurt and betrayed, and this could lead to complications. Being open about your life will assure your lover that he/she is with a sane, understanding person.

Besides, you need to maintain your space. Your whole life should not be based on him/her. He/She is just a part of your life. You must have your own goals, aspirations, hobbies, etc. Discontinuation of this will only make you a boring person.

Be a good listener. Everyone needs someone to hear their problems. Be your partner’s best friend. Advice him/her when appropriate, give him/her a shoulder to cry on, only then will she/he feel like reciprocating the same when you need to talk to him/her. If you feel your partner has done something wrong, politely tell her in an open manner, and surely she will take it in the right way.

Interact with her loved ones. Meet her best friends, siblings, parents. They will like you for who you are, and accept you in their world. If she/he has any friends of the opposite sex, you will feel more secure after meeting the person, rather than creating your own perspective and letting your thoughts take over when he/she goes to meet them.

Be interesting. Talk about your job, your music, etc. You want to keep him/her interested. Nobody wants to hear mushy talk 24/7. Discuss current events, share your views and exchange ideas.

Celebrate special occasions. On anniversaries, birthdays, etc, be there for each other. Make the day special. However, it is impractical to expect one’s partner to go out with him/her on these days if they are having a really important day at work, or an exam coming up. etc. Buy him/her gifts. They will have something around to always remember you by. Do not cringe on your outings. Maintain a level of class. That being said, spending lavishly is also not advised.

Give him/her freedom. If he/she wants to go partying with friends, you have to take it in the right spirit and let him/her go. After all, its just one evening. Besides, he/she needs time away from you, and needs to tell his/her friends all the good stuff about you too. This way, you get your time with friends too. Never ignore your friends when you are in a relationship, as they are the ones who will support you if anything bad happens to the relationship. Value their presence. Be there for them.

To sum up, the basic secrets of a successful relationship would be trust, communication, love, and understanding. You cannot go wrong if you make this work.

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