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Is it Love?

Bhoomika Arora:

Once in a while, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale.

Suddenly we start listening to romantic songs. Stupid things now appear cute. Even the romantic scenes in a movie which once were something to laugh at, are suddenly so meaningful.

We notice the minutest details of that one special person. We want to know where they are, what are they doing. We wait for their messages, we care about them. One would say that it’s friendship. But think again. Do you talk to all your friends the way you talk to that one special person? Do you really think that all your friends are the same? If you do, then either you haven’t really found the right one or you are just scared to accept the fact that someone can actually fall for you and vice versa.

People who have truly fallen in love are often referred to as “blinded”, “fools”, or some other indication of stupidity, either temporarily or otherwise. I think it’s because the extremely good outlook they emanate is understandingly misunderstood.

Those people who do not display such a quality are assumed by the others to be dim witted, and are regarded as such. However, finding true love makes everything in your world become okay, no matter how messed up it was and still is. Those who don’t believe this are unfortunate; what they see as blindness and stupidity is actually the most liberating, empowering, stress relieving, stimulating and wonderful thing that could possibly happen to two people.

But now the question is that, do people really know what love is. What feels like love to one person may be nothing more than attraction to another. Some people fall in and out of love quickly and often while others are never really in love as much as they are in lust.

This can get confusing when you are a teen because romantic love is a relatively new concept for you and you don’t know what to expect. You are overwhelmed with all sorts of new feelings. Social pressures are also one of the things that might encourage you to fall for anyone you think is ‘not bad’. Yes, peer pressure is not just limited to studies. If my friend has a boy friend why don’t I? Am I not good enough?

I have seen teenagers putting up their status updates on social networking sites more on lust than love.(which they consider to be love). We, the modern generation has so much freedom; may it be the freedom to choose what we want to watch, what we want to do, where we want to go! But at times we do exploit our freedom by getting into uncanny relationships which end up devastating us because all what we were thinking at that time was to have a boy friend or a girlfriend. There is no right age of falling in love, but commitment and maturity level are the two ingredients that love does require.

When you do meet the ‘real’ person on the other end, remember that you have grown to like that person because of what’s inside their mind and heart and not because someone said its high time you need a boyfriend or a girlfriend! You have found a potential ‘soul mate’ who thinks as you think and feels much the same way that you feel.

We all have our own flaws and shortcomings. The concept of finding the ‘right’ person is good. The concept of finding the ‘perfect’ person is improbable and discouraging, because ‘perfect’ doesn’t exist. The way this person looks, their physical appearance, isn’t as important as their inner looks, or soul. What we see is what we get, and hopefully the heart ranks the highest. We fall in love with someone’s soul, not the shape or size of their body. And although a certain number of things can be done to improve physical appearance, that shouldn’t be our main criteria or requirement for friendship or companionship. We fall in love with their heart, with their inner self, with their true being. And that’s what matters most.

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