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Why Make Divorce Easy?

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By Modini Yantrapati:

What are the laws that need the urgent attention of the government? One that deals with the increasing, and horrific, instances of so-called “honour killings”, where young women and men are being murdered for no other reason than choosing whom they will marry, a right that is guaranteed to them as citizens of this democratic country? Or one that will make divorce easier for those who want to opt out of marriage? These are not mutually exclusive choices. But because they have a direct impact on the lives of millions of women and men, they cannot be rushed through without adequate thought and debate. On the former, there is still some discussion and no conclusion yet. On the latter, strangely enough, the government seems to have made up its mind and is contemplating introducing a new provision in The Hindu Marriage Act that will permit divorce under “irretrievable breakdown of marriage”.
Divorce is still relatively uncommon in India compared to any other countries. The incidence of divorce is barely 1.9 percent of registered marriages. This figure of course would not include a much higher percentage of desertions that routinely occur, where men leave their wives and children and live a bigamous life without any fear that the law will ever catch up with them. Such women are left in limbo, still legally married, unable to go with another relationship, and left without financial support. In a country where poverty and illiteracy are common, the figures if ever collated of such women would be staggering.

Specific Grounds

Under the Hindu Marriage Act and the Special Marriage Act there are specific grounds on which divorce can be sought. These include adultery, cruelty, desertion, conversion to another religion, unsoundness of mind, virulent and incurable form of leprosy, venereal disease in a communicable form, renouncement of the world and not heard as being alive for a period of seven years or more. There’s a provision for divorce by mutual consent. Under this, both parties have to file a petition in court and are given six months after its admission and up to 18 months to change their minds. If neither party withdraws, the divorce is granted.

But lawyers and women’s groups, who have known firsthand the problems deserted women, or those who are victims of cruelty within their marriages, or have to live with adulterous husbands, say that such a provision will place a bigger burden on women. At present, a mutual consent divorce is the easiest and only possible way if both the parties want to break up. Otherwise, one or the other has to prove a “fault”. Women often do not take the first step, particularly those who are not financially independent, as they cannot pay for the litigation and also fear that even if there is divorce, the final settlement will not suffice for them to survive on their own. And if the woman has to leave her matrimonial home, she would not have the resources to get another house unless that was the part of final settlement. And the current law does not mandate a formula for a financial settlement that would take care of the woman’s shelter needs.

Also in a society where being married grants women “respectability”, a divorce means losing that status. There is no legal compensation for this and no sign that our society is likely to change its attitude toward divorced or unmarried women in a hurry. Hence, the women will always hesitate before filing for divorce. The bottom line is that provisions for divorce are not gender neutral in a society like ours where there is no level playing field for men and women. Therefore, before any such provision is introduced, there needs to be a much closer scrutiny of its impact on poor women without independent economic resources who constitute the majority of this country. You cannot bring in law that would ease the way for a small minority without considering the impact on majority.

This is not to say that women or men should be permanently tied into loveless or cruel marriages. Divorce is a way out of such situations and marriage is not sacrosanct as some hold. But the provisions for divorce must be just. Of course, women have a hard time proving that their husbands are cruel, or bigamous, could also use this provision to end their marriages. But such women are usually those with financial independence and the ability to negotiate a decent settlement. The majority of women would not dare use the provision for fear that they would be left with nothing. On the other hand, for their husbands, this would be very handy piece of law to opt out of the marriage, and then go in for another.

Recently a reader who responded to the news that the government was going to introduce this provision — says that she was stranded by her husband since she could not give him sons and no mother like her should take the stand and simply go ahead with female foeticide. This is just one voice. There are many more. They need to be heard and heeded. Why is the government in such a hurry?

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You must be to comment.
  1. gopal kale

    I am gopalkrishna M. kale Maharashtra state.
    Oualification: M.Sc. (Comp. Sci) Native place Ambajogai.I have 2 brothers. one is working in Amul Dairy (M.Sc.) and second is completed veternory Diploma.My wifes native place is arranged marriage has been done on 14-dec-06.but she in not living with me
    she lives with my house only 2 to 3 months.
    i was send legally 2 notices on (14 may 08) come to join with me but she is not…
    after 2 years i filed the diverce case in ambajogai dist. court. dt 01 -jan-09
    but she give the 498a private complain in wps CCS at hyderabad
    me my father and my mother was arrasted on 28 th june 2009 3 to 4 days we are in jail at chanchalguda after 4 days judge had given to bail me & my fathers bail cost 50000/-
    mother bail cost 10000/-
    after she demanded my family setellement 3500000/- Thirty five lakhs and above………
    My father is a maharashtra govt. servent mother is house wife. she give complain to mantrilaya in my fathers department.
    after my father has been suspentioned on june 09
    now father has jobless after 1 and half year my father will be retired
    again she give the complain with me 125 act i recived the notice on 16 aug 09
    my father is very nervous with my problems…
    me & my family is very upset…
    again she private complain me under sec. 420 again i was arrasted in june 2010.
    please tell me the correct advice.
    thank you
    Gopal kale.

    1. YouthKiAwaaz

      Hi Gopal,

      We have full sympathy with you on this, but we would recommend that you contact a legal advisor on these matters. Hope you get immediate help.

    2. Sony Thomas

      you can understand the basic knowledge include maintenance cost from the following link,

  2. Jay


    Very sad to hear ur story. Infact u didn’t find enough information or didn’t seek legal advise after ur wife left ur house. Police shouldn’t arrest u without any counselling after the filing of the case as u r not a criminal or terrorist. To arrest a civilian with a case of 498A police shuld have a approval letter from DCP rank.

    Go through the below link and u ‘ll find enough information on how to face ur wife and legal procedures.

    Wish u all the best



    Hi !!
    I agree to all settlement with may wife to living together , my wife also ready to living
    together .but her father & mother are torcher her to opposite opinion with me & she
    would like behaviour there parents
    so tell me how can i do about my divorce opinion


    For a progressive country and society, the laws of the land should change with the changing times. The necessity of the hour is to bring in Irretrievable Breakdown of Marriage as an amendment to the existing divorce laws. However said that, the law should be made gender neutral, property and assets acquired by the couple after marriage should be redistributed to both parties and the welfare of children borne out of the wedlock be given prime importance, before deciding upon the divorce. Also important will be, the number of years the couple had given to their marriage, in deciding upon the alimony. Finally, the process of divorce needs to be sped up, so that the productive years of either the boy or the girl is not wasted in the courtrooms, but be better utilized in contributing to the welfare of the country and society. Divorce is not a crime! It’s a choice which an individual makes. Let’s start respecting it!

  5. amandeep singh

    i got married forcibly 6 months ago.but i don’t want to live with my wife more,i want divorce, pleas suggest me a right way to get divorce.

  6. Rohit

    Ho I got married in april 2009. i have a daughter. i did love marriage. On time of marriage members including parents of my wife has done big drama. even they have used abused word. after that everything was file till my daughter birth. after that their parents accept their fault. i did accept because of my daughter. one year back she left my house without telling to me and my parents. we have not taken single paney from she is staying with them . his brother is on good post in judsial. i want my daughter and she should come back . please suggesst me that , is it possible they can go for divorce , but i donot want . they say that he takes drink and having relation with other. these kind of rumor they are spreading but i am working in MNC. i got married her after five year reltionship. plz suggest me

  7. sweety

    My husband is successful businessman, had 2 cars also. I luv him but also hate him for continuous chatting & affairing with girlfriends through mobile. He wont leave his mobile for some minutes even after coming home. He need me only at night. This happens since 2 yrs. But now I want to divorce him. I m not financially independent. what to do ? pls suggest.

  8. pravin

    i was in relation with a girl from last 2 years.. we love each other very much.. but we are from different caste.. thats why her family forced her to marry with another guy..
    her age is 23 years.. but whoom he married his age is 37 years and he is reach man.. but she is not happy with him.. she is forcing me to come and rescue me from that man.. i am also with him.. but her family is against her.. but i wan help her.. what should i do to help her i want to marry with her.. pls give me the suggestion..

  9. Sony Thomas

    Great thought. But there are few items I have to disagree with you,

    1. Divorce is not a common thing in India, these days its really high rate and growing further high.

    2, As per these documents divorce procedure in India is not an easy task as it has religion involvement, please go through the following docs ,

    However I as I said its a good thought and would give basic understanding to the public.

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