By Aparajita Paul:
Strength. We all look for it — and more often than not do somehow find it. It could be physical strength that comes out of strenuous exercise, or verbal that comes from cogent a thought and clear expression, or then emotional that comes from resilience and self control. Whatever it may be — strength is a very potent trait one needs to develop to continue living.
There are moments in life when things fall apart. And the most discomforting period ensues. Those big blows, in my mind are metropolitan junctions of our lives — where we take a significant turn. A turn that architects how the following days, months and sometimes even years will look like.
From the deviation in course caused by these incidents – there is an abundance of learning. Learning that is intrinsic to ones own self. Yes, you learn about people. Yes, you learn about emotions. Yes, you learn about situations. But, what you learn about the most is yourself.
“What doesn’t kill you — only makes you stronger!” And oh it does. As days pass and we’re able to accept the fact that worse did hit the fan — one embarks upon a journey to figure out themselves. Of what he can stand and what he can’t. About how certain things matter and how some don’t anymore.
Things, situations, people who bring immense joy in ones life, joy that one hadn’t ever experienced vanish. Their permanence, which at the peak of their ‘cameo’ is actually one gushing with deceit. The smart ones catch it. The rest fall for it.
But what disappoints me most is when people ridicule what they had. When they question what they had. When they mock *searing pain* what they shared. Why do they do so? Is it because they seek credence in their strength and tenacity to fare through setbacks, where in actuality they know they are bereft of the same?
Am I strong person if I can accept that I am weak? Or is that a contradiction to begin with?
I remember having an intense discussion with a couple of friends a few weeks back. The bone of contention was Soul Mates. I generally do believe in supernatural powers and am very superstitious about the lamest of stuff, but this one really did strike an intense chord inside. I finally concluded that every person in this world has soul mates (yes, plural). Their soul mates are people who will be present in each of their lives, one after the other. That their soul mates are the only constant in their many lives apart from themselves. In one life they could be friends, in another brothers, in another share bonds of matrimony, in another be neighbors. But they will absolutely be in each other’s lives. They don’t necessarily need to be the same kind of people. They don’t necessarily need to like each other. The only requisite is the presence and existence in each other’s lives.
You might not have actually met your soul mate till now — or then it might just be your creepy neighbor who puts “Who Let The Dogs Out” (yes, even in 2010) at an unhealthy decibel level every Saturday night at 2am and sings and dances along.
Have you ever wondered who your soul mate is? It’s quite a riveting exercise. Go ahead and think about it.
But to finally conclude this abstract musing, I do think that whosoever is my soulmate, would give me strength. S/he would be someone who appreciates our moments together, however shortlived or chaotic they might be. Do I feel inadequate that I would draw strength from another person to sustain myself? Absolutely not. Just accepting in the first place, that “I need help” in my mind, is what takes some real strength.