Raising A Child: Are We Doing It Right?

Posted on March 19, 2013 in Society

By Anu Manhotra:

It looked dark, darker than ever, everyone running with a smile on their fake faces and they don’t even seem to understand if they are happy or the happiness in the form of the smile appearing on their fake face is also fake; are they happy with this fake smile? Are they happy showing the world that they are happy? Are they happy showing the world their worldly possession or they really want this? Are they not aware that what they want is not right? Are they not looking for real happiness deep inside us or they are not aware of inner self at all ? Do they really not want to discover the truth and they are happy with the lie? , but how do I know that they all are wrong ,they don’t know their inner self or am I too concerned ?

These are all the questions that I really don’t get answers for, its truly like running in the dark and getting hit again and again ,it’s a painful and haunting experience ,it looks like its been ages since I have experienced “Shanti” (peace). These questions hit me harder now as I have to be more careful while I walk. I have to be more prudent regarding my final destination as now I have another generation behind me. I am a parent now, if I go wrong they will surely do and so I don’t want to make mistakes, but the major worry is they just don’t see me ,they see the world too. The world has become a bare, shameless place; I feel ashamed of walking with my new generation and seeing this bare reality. How do I deal with it? Why do we need to expose this bareness in such a harsh manner, when it is not required at all ?


Non stop question-answer session has become a routine for me ,I am sure many other parents too are facing the same problem. Another major issue is that such thoughtful lot is very few and we are termed as rare and antique parents in today’s hi tech,fast paced world because what we teach is considered stale and out of fashion. When I teach my child to be true and fearless, I fear that this world will not accept him, because it is the time for artificial. I don’t want him to get artificial but where will he stand in this artificial world if he is real? I teach him morals, values and goodness, but nobody seems to understand these terms anymore as the MQ (Moral Quotient) of the parents, elders or teachers is very low or rather MQ does not exist. ,this world understands IQ , EQ also SQ but has no place for MQ. I want my son to have a high MQ ,but when no body understands and identifies with it ,will it help my son to survive in future? Very soon I get an unconvincing answer ,as I see most of the parents living an amazing glittery life with zero MQ ,kids are not aware and don’t want to be aware of the Moral quotient at all. They are happy with its non existence; kids, today, are taught to be over smart and pomp and the world compliments them for this smartness. This is the smart world, I don’t feel bad but I get scared so as to how artificial and unreal things have taken over the goodness and reality and why so many people are becoming its prey. More and more people joining this lot of smart beings make the other smaller group appear out of the competition, the smaller lot not has high MQ but is seen as “Antique”. I know that truth has become an antique ,but since when? Why simplicity is out of fashion and how did we all let it happen? Why did we not stop it at the very beginning? Can we stop all this now? Can we return to simplicity and the truth which is the core of our existence?

The solution is very simple yet not followed by many parents ,but I have a hope if “ Moral education”( naitik Shiksha) is imparted to the kids at tender age by the elders and their parents and if we strengthen their roots, surely we can go back to simplicity and reality. The foremost fear is we, as parents, and elders fail to teach them morals. Let us first be a model for them ,let us be good ,so that we can pass on this goodness to our future generations and make them strong. Modern parents join their kids in an excellent hi tech school full of luxury and they feel they are the best but as a parent we shall be responsible to impart the moral education forever, so, our job continues even if they start attending school.

Most of the parents define and understand “Education = Money ”,child is taught from a very young age that if you want to earn good, you should study good. They send them to best college to get a lifesaver certificate that will fetch them a 6 digit salary ,parents teach them that if they want to have a good and luxurious life, they should study; it will help them maintain a good standard. So, studying is shown as a way to achieve all the materialistic and worldly goals. It has nothing to do with wisdom and independence. Let us first understand ourselves what education, knowledge and wisdom is ,only then will our future generation respect it .