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To Dad, With Love: A Daughter’s Account Of Growing Up With A Loving Father

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By Gunjan Gupta:

(Hello dear readers, this is my first article in Youth in Awaaz. I think this issue is important because fathers really are an underrated parent and we need to be more demonstrative of our love for them. I lost mine recently and I regret not telling him that he was my life. I would really appreciate feedback on this note in terms of content, language and all the allied.)

You have to admit, dads are a little underrated parent. Most of us are always vocal about our love for our mothers but when it comes to fathers, with their strong presence around, we stiffen up a little. We go talk to them when a parent’s signature is needed on poorly performed test papers or when our pockets are not-so-full or when you need permission for that most awaited school trip, a la-Kajol in DDLJ. You might disagree with me and I’ll be only too glad to know that.

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Fathers are grounded like a huge tree with crisp green leaves, sheltering us with their love and enveloping us in their protection, commanding respect, asking for nothing in return. Fathers stand tall and strict, scolding us for not getting enough marks and not being responsible enough. They are terse for when we forget to read the newspaper. They nag when we are not impeccable with our driving. They repeatedly remind us of what we want to do with our lives. They, like clockwork, tell us how we need to practice more of mathematics and physics. They interrupt their sleep happily just to wake us up angrily. They are harsh with us at times, even in front of an audience. Their love is expressed in ways we resent at times running to mommy who would invariably agree with and accept all our faults. But years later, we realize how lucky we were to be a privy to it and thank God for all that they did.

The strictness aside but fathers have such a soft and delicate corner for their children, especially daughters. The fact is universal. Sons, true, are dealt with a little more rigidity. I see two years male babies being scolded in a sweet way while the little princesses get all the royalty in spite of being more wrong than poor boys. Fathers are a putty in front of puppy faces of their daughters. They dance to the music of the little finger their tiny girls (daughters, to them, never grow up). They would go to any length to provide every comfort to their daughters. Sons, be not disappointed. Your dads love you except their love for you is always subtle but very strong. They say and do things to toughen you up. To make you ready to face harsh conditions.

They wake up early, make you some tea so you are wide awake for that one last revision before an exam. They iron your school dress, polish your shoes so no monitor can point a finger at you. They call you right when you reach home back from school to ask if you did well in your exam and sigh with disappointment when you tell them about silly mistakes. They ask you if you need anything for evening snack when coming back from office. They make sure your TV,laptops, music systems and mobiles are in perfect working condition so you are never bored. They buy you tonnes of books so you can learn. They talk to you about finances so you can make proper decisions later. Every word that they say is only to make you a better person, so, you have all the knowledge they can offer and when they think that they lack it they promptly get you something to read. They go that extra mile so you have utmost comfort at home. They call the electricity department offices the moment electricity goes off so you don’t have to bear the heat even for a moment. They make sure their actions let you know how you mean the world to them.

The world feels a safe place to live in with them and without them, it’s like mayhem.

You must be to comment.
  1. Mahitha Kasireddi

    To me this is best piece of writing. In fact I should admit I got to understand a bit of my dad. I am the only child and I find it annoying when my dad gets to bothered about everything I do. May be I should not mind that anymore. Trust me, your language is all good as it is the most impulsive piece of writing and cannot be written any better than this 🙂

    1. Gunjan Gupta

      Dear Mahitha,thank you so much for the comment.Yes,I have been there-annoyed by constant chiding from dad.But it’s all for our good.Whatever we become it is because of our parents’ massive sacrifices and love.Now that he is not there I can’t help but remember all his efforts no matter how much I hated them then.

  2. Anirudh G

    Nicely written…lovely article indeed… 🙂

  3. Shiuli Lara Dutt

    THAT’S MY DAD WHO IS NOW A PROUD GRAND DAD ! LOVE YOU PAPA.

  4. Ayush Gupta

    Well, it reminds me of the sacrifices of my dad for me…His constant naggings and scoldings to make me independent..his selfless love and in return demanding nothing..Your article is really amazing, touching the innermost corners of the heart and reminding of the creature that is so often ignored and is viewed only as an ATM Machine..You touched every aspect and deeply felt for what you have written..Well I’m sorry for your loss and I wish I would be able to maintain a healthy relationship with my hero..

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Now as an MH Fellow with YKA, she’s expanding her impressive scope of work further by launching a campaign to facilitate the process of ensuring better menstrual health and SRH services for women residing in correctional homes in West Bengal. The campaign will entail an independent study to take stalk of the present conditions of MHM in correctional homes across the state and use its findings to build public support and political will to take the necessary action.

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Harshita is a psychologist and works to support people with mental health issues, particularly adolescents who are survivors of violence. Associated with the Azadi Foundation in UP, Harshita became an MHM Fellow with YKA, with the aim of promoting better menstrual health.

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A student from Delhi School of Social work, Vineet is a part of Project Sakhi Saheli, an initiative by the students of Delhi school of Social Work to create awareness on Menstrual Health and combat Period Poverty. Along with MHM Action Fellow Sabna, Vineet launched Menstratalk, a campaign that aims to put an end to period poverty and smash menstrual taboos in society.

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A former Assistant Secretary with the Ministry of Women and Child Development in West Bengal for three months, Lakshmi Bhavya has been championing the cause of menstrual hygiene in her district. By associating herself with the Lalana Campaign, a holistic menstrual hygiene awareness campaign which is conducted by the Anahat NGO, Lakshmi has been slowly breaking taboos when it comes to periods and menstrual hygiene.

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