MILF, Gonzo, BBW, Hentai, DP. Yes, these are words straight out of a porn site.
25 million sites or 12% of all the sites on the Internet are pornographic in nature.
One-third of all porn viewers are women. Oh wait, let me write those in capital letters so that it sinks in, yes WOMEN.
I am sorry; did it hurt your territoriality? Yes, YOU, the man reading this (While the men read this twice, the girls can smirk).
Porn is something that men think they have to themselves; this perception has been true for long but not anymore. Just because women don’t admit to it openly, a large share of them do watch pornography only to end up being disappointed, amused or scarred for life. They end being disappointed because they cannot find what they need.
They are amused because mainstream pornography is unrealistic and sometimes extremely funny. They are scarred for life because of how they are portrayed in those movies. The India Today Sex Survey 2013 shows that 35% of women in India admit to watching pornography, this is a 22% rise compared to the 13% in 2003. The numbers have said enough. My turn now.
When it comes to watching porn, the words ‘woman’ and ‘porn’ do not go generally together. When it comes to women in porn, I cannot see them there either. I say that because a body with breasts and a vagina is a machine that caters to the whims and fancies of men. To all the three parties, the male performer, the director and the average man watching it on the internet. Modern day pornography projects women as mere objects with no feelings or desires of their own, all they can do is please the man, even when he slaps her or gags her or when 20 men have intercourse repeatedly with a woman whose hands and legs have been shackled, and she is screaming her lungs out. A woman is reduced to an animal that doesn’t have a voice of its own.
Most porn videos have just a penis on the screen whereas the woman or rightfully in this case – the machine, gets full focus. The high definition camera preys on her body and her face contorting in fake pleasure, all of this, so that the man watching it on the internet thinks HE is the one doing it, if the male performer in his entirety comes into the picture, it is said that the man watching the video is likely to be threatened by ‘Homoeroticism’. I can say this stands absolutely true, supposedly, for an Indian heterosexual male or the men on the bench of the apex judiciary body in our country, who are apparently too threatened. Hence, that inane verdict.
I remember watching a discussion on television on whether marital rape should be brought into the category of a non-bailable offence or not, wherein this woman, hiding behind her ghunghat accepted while tears ran down her face that she was raped by her husband again and again over the course of their marriage. She said he would come back home, drunk, watch ‘Blue Films’ and ask her to exactly do what’s been done in the movie. He forced himself upon her when she when she refused.
Pornography has been increasingly incorporating and sexualising aggression on the screen. Women are beaten, insulted, used, all of which is supposed to appear ‘normal and appropriate’; the fact that this is supposed to arouse/appeal to the male porn viewing population (which is substantially large in number) is extremely scary.
The objectification of women and the violence that comes along with it among many other things calls for a different kind of porn. Feminist porn.
When I asked a few people what ‘feminist porn’ meant to them, someone said it is ‘gay porn’, someone said “oh it is all about the dominatrix standing in a latex suit with a whip in her hand” and some didn’t even know how to comprehend it because to them the concept of feminist porn seemed unreal and alien. Feminist porn is all about sex as something that two people do together, consensually, something that has both the man and the woman on an equal footing. Feminist porn is all about real sex, it doesn’t shun the concept of rough or group sex, what it does is provide or support such a movie with detailed interviews by the performers as to what arouses or appeals to them and to what extent are they comfortable.
Feminist porn is also about dismantling stereotypes related to the notions of male sexuality. It is about conveying actual emotions, wherein it actually matters to the man what the woman needs or what the woman may like, surprisingly many straight men prefer this kind of porn than the hard-core pornography that is generally available. Strong headed independent women like Tristan Taormino and Candida Royalle, who believed in the concept of feminist porn, started way back in the 1990s to reform the kind of pornography that is made available to people. They believed in feminist porn because it was also about the female performers, if the kind of environment they worked in was consensual, fair and ethical and they actually enjoyed what they did and no act was against their wishes.
Feminist porn has also become synonymous with ‘Couple Porn’, something that a couple can enjoy watching together. There are so many dimensions to this concept of pornography, it would surprise you and make you think twice. It isn’t just pornography after all, it works at many levels in transforming the sexual culture of a society.
Violence in pornographic movies and to what extent it translates itself in real life is a difficult thing to predict, but it does make a huge difference. Remember when there were people during the Delhi Gang Rape last year who kept blaming pornography as something the accused had seen and learned from and regurgitated on the victim? It might have been true. We do not really know. Think.
What with 90 million copies of the Fifty Shades Trilogy sold and embraced by the womankind, one can very clearly see that the modern woman is someone who is sexually liberated and not afraid to let the partner know what she feels. She’s someone who refuses to identify herself with a taut blonde woman with collagen-filled lips, silicone filled assets and geometric tans as the image of the only kind of woman who’s ‘desirable’ but someone who demands the kind of pornography that doesn’t degrade her womanhood but does exactly, ethically, what needs to be done.
After all, why should boys have all the fun, eh?
Halim
I have a cousin who sells vibrators.. He says he has plenty of customers.. and he lives in semi-rural India!!
Astha Agarwal
Pornography isn’t inherently violent. It can be subversive, only if, women aren’t objects of oppression who are violated by men on and out of the screen. Watching consensual sex between consenting adults (not limiting it to heterosexual sex) will make a good porn for those who enjoy watching sexual intercourse. Those who enjoy watching women beaten up in myriad humiliating ways, and seek pleasure in it, partake in perpetuating the myths (or reality?) of patriarchal violence. It is time we changed the way men-women relationships are produced and reproduced overtime. Media may not have been the cause of such violence against women, but it does take part in perpetuating it.
Trishla
I think it is about bringing in female discourse within the porn industry. And also, it is not necessary because women also view porn but it is necessary because male-female relationships depicted in porn have a tendency to give into patriarchal mythos. We need to show women as desiring subjects and men as pleasing subjects as well. Currently in the majority of porn that is available shows men as desiring subjects, women as objects that seek to please men in various ways. We need to show women as people who can have sexual needs and who want to be pleased by men. (This is just about heterosexual porn) I feel that in homosexual porn one can reverse the use of props and make-up, the identification of a particular style of clothing with a particular gender and then the actions they represent can be reversed as well. That should serve the purpose.
Madhuri
Most the men dont know the fact that women watch porn and conveniently shun the notion that even women have sexual desires. NO, I am not talking a dumb , illiterate man but this is the general case of most of the literate men too. In a patriarchal society, with all the power that is enjoyed by men, they also feel that physical desire is a special privilege for men and women are mere robots without any sexual or physical desire of their own. Men are mostly ignorant of wat a women feels or dont given give a damn. Femal porn seems to be a good idea and i hope this article will open the eyes of men who just want to sulk in their world of illusion and think that a women who watxhes porn are no less than whores.
netra
Women may watch porn out of curiosity, but that doesn’t mean they watch it on a daily basis like men. We watch porn so that we can have a quick wank and carry on with our lives. different things may click for men while watching them, but they need to be rough, vigorous and quick and hence this idea of feminist although is a turn on, but I can never wank on a porn about love, I may get some tips though.
Diksha
Feminist porn is a very good idea but watching porn doesn’t arises a woman as much as a man can be aroused by it!!
uzair belgami
interesting article. kindly share the reference for the statistic you’ve highlighted in the headline.
sukantrulez
when i was in class 6th i guess i read a joke somewhere on ” who enjoys sex more,men or women? so a lady replied when u pick ears or nose with your finger which one feels better? nose/ear or finger. so i guess boys dont actually have all the fun. 😉
Kiran George
I LOVE this article. About time somebody came out and said it too.
But I would like to add that a lot of women are in fact into BDSM (Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission), which involves a minimal level of physical pain to maximize pleasure. So even though some kinds of porn may appear to be sexist and violent, they actually appeal to a number of women.
Priya
Very interesting article..:) Cheers..:)
This validates the quote “Why should boys have all the fun”…but as dikhsha says porn doesn’t arise a women as much as it does to a men.. i would say that this idea of being dependent on a guy is so deeply instilled in our system that it will actually take some time for us to get over these stupid beliefs & ideologies…we must understand that our happiness should never be a function of how others treat us..so is with our sexual desires…let alone others i myself would want to master the art of hedonism
An egalitarian man.
Dear author, I’m sorry I could not finish reading this article over your screams. I don’t understand what is wrong with you. You watch some BDSM stuff and equate it to marital rape. I think you need to understand that there are far more varieties of porn than you can imagine. The intenet supplies to all demands of porn, some of them even illegal.
Just putting a feminist label on something which already exists and advocating for it is immature. If you dont like something you see, chances are, there are more genres to choose from.
There are different kinds of people. And I suspect whether all women watch the same kind of porn. Also, there are women of all sizes and shapes in porn.
It is also a fact that men respond better to visual stimuli while women respond better to literature.
All I have to say is that if you’re frustrated that you didnt find something to float your boat, look harder, they cater to pretty much everyone.
Also, wasn’t feminism against porn? Wasn’t it labelled to be objectification of women? Yet, women in porn make a lot more than men. And achieve a lot more fame.
You can’t say bullshit and claim it to be feminism. That’s disrespectful to the women who are actually struggling for “equality”. Not special treatment.
rajkanyadm
@an egalitarian man
Sir, i am pretty amused by what you have to say. Although i would have appreciated it so much more had you put in a little less effort in denigrating both the author and the article and tried putting your point in a better way.
For starters, it’ll be a good thing to ‘google’ Feminist porn, find out more about the subject. Also, I am pretty sure you have attention issues, i did NOT equate BDSM with Marital Rape. I am someone who is putting forth her own opinion and her own take on the topic.
To make an anonymous account and calling yourself an egalitarian man and finding faults in the author is the perfect example of chivalry. Bravo. You can take a bow.
You must have done your Ph.D in pornography, i am imploring for forgiveness for writing such an article, i did after all hurt your territoriality.
An advice – Why don’t you pen down what you feel about the topic and send it to Youth Ki Awaaz? I am sure they would notice your adeptness and marvel at such a genius and embrace your opinion with open arms.
Good luck 🙂
gautam govinda
dear author, do you think if you wrote articles like this about women liberation or their sexuality and fetishes and belittle all the men around the world, then you will get girls’ attention? NO. You are and will be as miserable as you ever were. Beating your boner to antarvasna stories. If you really want people to get interested, please write a sensible article. There are far more serious things than who watches what kind of porn. For god’s sake, there are children dying in Somalia.
Nitum Jain
If there are children dying in Somalia, there are plenty of women dying in India because men (and porn) believe it’s arousing to brutalize a woman during sex. You sure have the priorities of your gender straight when you say that all men opine because they wish to catch women’s attention (Please do try to note the sarcasm here, unlike how you missed it throughout the article).
Do us all a favour and go to Somalia to work for the children. India and it’s women can’t bear the presence of your type.
gautam govinda
also, you must be the kind of chap who used to go to the teacher to complain about everything and got good marks and in short, was a wussy who never got female attention much. So you try to be a hero on a website. Real nice man. Real nice
Payal Dinodia
Really? Why, you must be an omniscient entity to presume to know everything about a person whose opinions make you uncomfortable.
I hope you understand the sarcastic undertones, cause you obviously are a dumbass of epic proportions.
Astha Dangwal
Funny Story : I told a guy pal of mine what “Hentai” was ! In case you are wondering what “Hentai” is, its Anime Porn !
AK
I am a woman and I totally agree with the author. I began watching porn when I was in class 9th (all you orthodox folks are more than free to comment on my wanton-ness, shamelessness, and whatever because I couldn’t care less? . I am 19 now and porn disgusts me. As a teen with raging hormones yet it aroused me more so because of my curiosity (and trust me I have watched even gruesome BDSM videos) but porn now does nothing but bewilder me. It is downright superficial and mechanical. It does nothing but promote videographed prostitution and distorts our perceptions of “normal”. Which is why I’ve turned to reading erotica which is atleast partly free from the kind of crazy fake stuff in porn. I wish there were porn movies with emotions, where people laugh have FUN and bond like people actually do in REAL life. Be it heterosexual, homosexual, groupie, a blowjob video, anything… atleast make it feel natural. Though I doubt I’d ever be watching porn again after I heard this TED talk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRJ_QfP2mhU&feature=kp
Aryan73
I have a confusion! Most of these porn is made out of India. Why putting up this matter over here? I don’t want to say the name of those countries,but all of this is legal out there. They likes
Hardcore sex, that’s all. You want to see lovey dovey porn? See Indian Porn.
And please those Data about porn viewers in India, Proves nothing! If you really hate all this then protest! Will you? No!!
All of the female porn viewers think the same as you do? No!!
Mysterious
You are biased. Let me explain. 50SOG or any kind of porn doesn’t promote crime against women and is not illegal
Not every type of porn which shows male as the dommy degrades women or portrays them as sex object. It is a part of it. It is a type of kink. A type of fetish.
If you say the “male dominant” kinda porn degrades womeneducation.y all types of female dominant porn like F/M which shows women as in charge or in control degrades men.
The reality is that porn doesn’t promote rape and guns don’t kill people. The men who degrade and rape women would have done it even if we didn’t have porn. It’s the upbringing the values they are induced with. They grew up in an environment where women are always viewed as inferior they were not taught by their parents or families to view women with respect.
Porn has nothing to do with in.
There are plenty of “vanilla” porn which show real sex which show both men and women having equality even in bed. It is again another type of sex or kink.
You seriously are biased and assume every woman out here is demanding female to always be equal in bed.
You don’t know that the part of women who do enjoy male dominated porn also are feminists who want to be viewed as equal in soceity. Get an educationm
Mysterious
We don’t need to view porn seriously. Like damn ease up.
People who were brought up with good education and good sex education doesn’t view porn as natural.
I know porn is mechanical and superficial but we should know the difference between porn and actual sex. You just seem to have a problem with people who engage in rough sex not knowing that it is also equally enjoyed by a women (not talking about NC)
It’s all about the soceity . Indian society has always viewed women as sex objects porn or no porn or any type of porn won’t affect it. Biased.
Mysterious
I agree with the guy who said she couldn’t find anything to float her boat.
This article is extreme bullshit and the author has no idea about how many types or porn is actually available.
Ironically when I tried to find m/f porn I got plenty of f/m instead
All of it was cons. You need to stop taking porn this seriously.