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“I Wasn’t Asking For It, Even If I Were Naked”, When Is A Woman To Blame For Rape?

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A woman is raped every 30 minutes in the country. Last year, as much as 33,707 rapes were reported in the country and an equal number of instances are said to go unreported. This grim reality of a woman’s constant worry for her safety in the country begs the question that where are we, as a country, and as a society, going wrong?

The answer lies probably within ourselves, and not in the outside factors that we attribute as the ‘cause behind rape’. There’s no justification for sexual or physical violence against women and no, the common “she asked for it”, rhetoric doesn’t count. Whatever be her clothing, behaviour or state of inebriation, it doesn’t give anyone the right to infringe on her personal space and justify any form of violence.

This video attempts to bring home the same point in a poignant manner. Watch the video, it will leave you with some questions which need urgent answering about our outlook towards violence against women.

To know more about what I think of this video, follow me on twitter at @Mayank1029

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  1. Babar

    Am I asking to be mugged, stabbed, or robbed when I am out alone at night. The obvious answer is no. However, as a precautionary measure, I can make sure I am home early, and do not venture out late at night. As for women, it is true that not all get raped because they were dressed inappropriately – but many do. The question is, why do women feel the need to dress provocatively in the first place? Women want men to respect them but they are not willing to respect themselves. And instead of coming up with theories about how society needs to change to cater to their needs, perhaps it is time women realized the importance of being at home after dark. Many women get raped when they are drunk, and then we have feminists crying “she wasn’t asking for it.” Yes, she wasn’t, but she could have taken responsibility for herself. Feminists want women to succumb to their theories about liberation, where women are free to do whatever they want and wear whatever they want, without any consequences or problems. It doesn’t happen in the real world.

    1. madzz

      We all, men women children etc make the society and also change the society, society is what needs to be blamed. Also possibly the way u think “staying at home after dark” isn’t always possible. say for example: I am a doctor by profession n put for night duties to save peoples’ lives. Sometimes there’s no option but to b back home late. That means according to u in the so called real world I should stop treating patients in the critical care and let them die or else put the other male doctors at extra work becoz I m a woman n I need to stay back home at night as I will b raped?

    2. Babar

      It gets dangerous at night, for both men and women, everywhere in the world, so please stop reiterating that society needs to change. Furthermore, every woman who has been raped was not working until late at night, most were either alone, enjoying their newfound independence, or partying and drinking. Also, with work, not every working woman is a single mother who can’t survive without her job.

    3. aditi

      You Sir are a douche bag and its a good thing you are here reading this blog because I think you really need to watch this everyday for the rest of your life atleast, to change the stupid way you think. Have a good day.

    4. Avinesh Saini

      Not that it will really affect him. He will stay the same.

  2. AMAN

    of course no one asks for any crime to be conducted against him/her…And of course Rape is a heinous crime…Victim blaming is an attempt to prove the patriarchal thoughts of most of the religions and the religious belief that Women are supposed to be inferior to men and they can never get a status of equality …This is one part

    Second part is when u go in a court of law rapist have only one available weapon to attack the victim and get free…That is to some how prove that the women is a characterless person or she had given her consent for the relationship …To prove this the professional lawyers begin to dissect the character of the women and then they come to the wearing of clothes to her relationships with other guys etc….Although a women may not have given her consent to some one to have physical relationship but these pointers play a very crucial role as rape crimes are mostly done in isolation where the victim and rapist are involved and the only fact that the victim has stated that it was a rape is not considered as enough evidence to prove that it was a rape..

    Lastly police play a very crucial role in such crime…Most of the police official specially men are hard core believers in patriarchy and male dominance…Thus for them a women coming to file an FIR for rape with skimpy clothes , they would certainly have her grilled first as to why has she been in such provocative clothes….Because in our country wearing of provocative clothes is a criminal offence…

    1. Walia

      Amit, I don’t know where you yome from but in India rape law (IPC-376) is so stringent that no matter even if you prove that a woman is prostitute and filed complaint after you failed to pay the amount, you will still be convicted. So in court, victim blaming never works.

      A simple example is more than 72% oc rape accused in Mumbai are boyfriends. After break up when a boyfriend denies to marry girlfriend, in India consensual sex between them becomes rape. If she breaks up, then a man can’t file case under IPC-376. This is double standard.

      In Delhi 53% of rape cases filed between 2013-2014 were fake. This does not include acquittals which is 78%. Acquittal in a rape case means that accused was able to prove his innocence as in rape cases, the burden of proof is on him.

      An Indian man according to law, can not be raped, can never face domestic violence, can never be treated with cruelty wither mental or physical).

      By the way, under IPC-376, jail in the form of custody is guranteed till end of trial wheter guilty or not because evidence act of India has been changed and presumes accused in such cases guilt until proven innocent which is simply against human rights. A trail takes anything between 1-4 yrs.

      And if set free, you can’t even sue the girl for implicating you falsely. That’s law.

      Last but not the least. India unlike other civilized country don’t even recognized rape/molestation/sexual abuse of a man and even after so many fake case, the number of rapes per head is 15 times lesser than US, 14 times than UK.

  3. Babar

    Victim blaming is an attempt to prove the patriarchal thoughts of most of the religions and the religious belief that Women are supposed to be inferior to men and they can never get a status of equality …This is one part

    What happens to equality when women marry men richer than them, earning more than them, go shopping with their husband’s money, have their husbands pay at restaurants, have seats reserved for them everywhere, from office to politics, and ask men to leave their seats for them in the name of being gentlemen. When was the last time a woman left her seat for a man? – Equality is only applicable when it works in favour of women.

    The truth is, feminism is about the superiority of women over men, which is why the media never highlights the problems faced by men. I wonder why we don’t talk about the biases that men face on a daily basis, about how women usurp half of men’s properties during divorces, about how courts give men stricter sentences for the same crimes that women commit, about how juries give verdicts against men in domestic disputes, about how men give alimony to women, about misandry in the media, about sexism against men, about how men are locked up in false cases of rape, dowry, and domestic abuse, about how their oppressors do not face punishment over false accusations, among a host of other things.

    Second part is when u go in a court of law rapist have only one available weapon to attack the victim and get free…

    Under the Indian judicial system, a woman can accuse a man of rape, domestic violence, or dowry harassment, with very little proof, if any, and have him imprisoned. Today, tens of thousands of innocent Indian men rot in jail for crimes they did not commit, courtesy of fabricated allegations by women.

    The draconian Indian law is being misused left, right, and center, where women have men imprisoned with false charges. From settling personal agendas to blackmailing for money, the law in India is being grossly manipulated by women. From relationships gone sour to broken promises of marriage, any reason is enough to falsely accuse men and land them behind bars. Of late, girls caught having premarital sex accuse their boyfriends of rape, without a care in the world about the boys’ reputation, future, career, and life.

    Is it any surprise that the number of suicide rates among men are soaring in India. According to The Hindu, as many as 1,35,445 people committed suicide in the country last year. Statistics released by the National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) show that excluding West Bengal, 79,773 men and 40,715 women had taken the extreme step. According to the statistics, a man in India commits suicide every six minutes.

    The Indian media does not highlight the plight of men because sympathizing with women’s causes brings them much needed attention. However, the suicide statistics tell a different story altogether. In India, it is men who are suffering at the hands of women.

    1. Fem

      Or maybe women tend to not take the easy way out and stay back on earth to look after her family rather than committing suicide and leaving the ones who are dependent on her on road.

      Another point – Are women sole causes of men’s suicide? Do they have no other sorrows?

    2. Walia

      So if women commit more suicide, they are victim of patriarchy..if men commit more suicide then they are irresponsible and weak.

  4. Babar

    The underlying agenda of feminists:

    “The nuclear family must be destroyed, and people must find better ways of living together.” – Linda Gordon, Function of the Family, Women: A Journal of Liberation, Fall, 1969.

    “We can’t destroy the inequities between men and women until we destroy marriage.” – Robin Morgan, Sisterhood is Powerful, 1970, p.537.

    “No woman should be authorized to stay at home and raise her children. Society should be totally different. Women should not have that choice, precisely because if there is such a choice, too many women will make that one.” — Simone de Beauvoir, “Sex, Society, and the Female Dilemma” Saturday Review, June 14, 1975, p.18

    “Marriage has existed for the benefit of men; and has been a legally sanctioned method of control over women… We must work to destroy it. The end of the institution of marriage is a necessary condition for the liberation of women. Therefore it is important for us to encourage women to leave their husbands and not to live individually with men.” -The Declaration of Feminism, November 1971.

    “Women, like men, should not have to bear children… The destruction of the biological family, never envisioned by Freud, will allow the emergence of new women and men, different from any people who have previously existed.” — Alison Jagger – Political Philosophies of Women’s Liberation: Feminism and Philosophy (Totowa, NJ: Littlefield, Adams & Co. 1977).

    “In order to raise children with equality, we must take them away from families and communally raise them.” – Dr. Mary Jo Bane, feminist and assistant professor of education at Wellesley College and associate director of the school’s Center for Research on Woman.

  5. Sammy

    Why their is a need of censorship. Girls are Free to Act and Wear and Say and Share; means what ever they want. It’s Audience who need to assimilate the true sense, Art behind that. Women Empowerment is Today’s Hottest Theme and that’s why Censorship only cease them so not to Reveal their Art by Words, Dialogues, Songs or even their Body. The thing you perceived as Vulgarity is fundamentally Her “Art” which she wants to exhibits . This will nurture the dreams of adolescent girls to be like them and with this strategy you are just ravaging the careers of upcoming Talent.

    And now undoubtedly you will ask that Why Girls Only – lemme clear this because there are only three types of Boys – One Who Stares and Do Rape (whether it is Physical or Mental) and second who Help/soothe Girls to Raise the Voice ( Your help is basically debilitating them, this is not women empowerment dude ) , and now it comes third typology – which is of Me Types , who are really pissed off just because how some “Budding Journos” are using this Powerful Media to prove a new theory of Women Empowerment, and every single day, what i am perceiving is “NOTHING”

    Well , One More Compliment , thanks for using this sort of English because that’s the only way many Common and Normal Humans could be Safe . . (show off i know u can’t help it )

  6. Khan

    There may be basic equality between men and woman but complete equality is not possible,men and woman are different in their structure,behavior,emotions,delicacy .
    there is always and equity or equivalency that is men have a upper hand in few cases and women in other cases this is how it works in nature and how it should have worked in society.
    We cannot ask complete equality between men and women but there is a dire need for equity.

  7. Crasnic

    08/09/2012Hi there I am so excited I found your wesitbe, I really found you by mistake, while I was researching on Yahoo for something else, Nonetheless I am here now and would just like to say thank you for a remarkable post and a all round thrilling blog (I also love the theme/design), I done28099t have time to go through it all at the moment but I have bookmarked it and also added your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read a great deal more, Please do keep up the fantastic job.

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