Coming Out: Of The Longest, Most Sadistic Wait Ever

Posted on August 11, 2015 in LGBTQ, Society, Taboos

By Shubhankar Verma for Cake

I was with my parents in the car, heading to the mall, tossing my phone between my palms, slowly and slowly growing ignorant to the commotion around me, to the words my parents were speaking as they were conversing, to the cars as they were swooshing by, to everything – I was thinking.

homosexuality

Have I accepted it?
Am I gonna do it?
Maybe I can change?
Should I just do it?

I ceased the playful tossing of my phone, unlocked it, opened ‘Messages’ and began writing: “There’s something I want to tell you. I am gay.” Then I filled in my then-best friend’s contact as the recipient and hit ‘Send’.

The thinking didn’t stop. It never did. It would pause but never cease.

Did I just make a mistake?
How will he react?
He’ll be accepting.
He’s not gonna accept it.
I made a mistake.

I awaited his response. Quite dramatically, it did feel like the longest, most sadistic wait ever.

And then the dreadful began to show its face. He called me.

To find out what happened next, head here.

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