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‘I Was Surrounded By White Women Who Were Celebrated For Their Beauty, While I Wasn’t’

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By Nisha Umesh:

Growing up in the United States, I would walk into my mother’s bathroom and sitting on the counter would be a tube of the cream “Fair and Lovely.” The cream is normally found in my birth country, India, where I saw TV ads positing the gained “beauty” of lighter skin. But here it was, transplanted across several oceans and continents. For the longest time I was baffled as to what the purpose of this product was, only learning later that it was a skin lightening agent designed for people of colour, particularly women with darker skin. In India skin lightening creams are the most popular among all skincare products.

For representation only

My mother has always been fairer than me, a bothersome realization, which in time affected how I perceived myself and my dark skin. I never felt good enough. Growing up in the U.S., I was surrounded by primarily white women, who were celebrated for their beauty, while I was not. For instance, Barbie dolls sold in stores were almost always white, and as a young girl this taught me that ideas of beauty were constructed in opposition to my body. Instead, beauty was white, slim, straight hair, thin lips, and a small pointed nose. I was constantly striving to emulate these dolls through my adolescence, an impossible feat.

Beauty standards in India predate its colonization by European imperial forces. The tradition of glorifying light skin and demonizing melanin is not new. In 1858, Indian poet Kalyan Mall wrote the Ananga Ranga, “an important work of Indian erotology,” around the 16th century. Mall describes the ideal woman with skin as “light as the surface of polished gold.

Furthermore, Rebecca Gelles, author of a sociological study, “Fair And Lovely: Standards Of Beauty, Globalization, And The Modern Indian Woman,” described the influence of Hindu Goddesses on the standards and resulting perceptions of beauty within India. The Goddesses glorified the “perfect” woman as “fair or medium-complexioned, has a narrow waist but wider hips and breasts, and has large eyes, full red lips, and long black hair that is either straight or wavy.

However, in light of the global economy of Western media, colonialism has played a fundamental role in structuring notions of beauty across widely different geographic regions. Indians are now consuming movies, music, and TV shows that are increasingly foreign; this transnational flow of media has further unified beauty norms to reflect those same standards that I saw on my Barbie dolls.

This has especially affected Bollywood, where further emphasis has been placed upon featuring actors who uphold the norms of fair skin, and a slim figure, among other Eurocentric norms.

Indian women venerate Bollywood actors, who reflect the “ideal” Indian woman, and adhere to the Eurocentric value of fairness and thinness. Yasmin Alibhai-Brown, a writer for The Independent, speaks about the time when Kareena Kapoor became drastically thinner over the span of her films. Yasmin stated that “size zero has arrived in India,” a disturbing result of post-colonial westernization.

Women of colour must constantly keep up with evolving beauty standards, which idolize white women. So I have to ask: What does it mean when your idea of beauty exists outside of your own body?

Living under the idea that you’re undesirable because you fail to meet white, cisgender, Eurocentric beauty standards has material, economic, and psychological consequences for women of color, such as lower pay, sexual violence, eating disorders, depression, anxiety etc.

Women of colour, especially trans women, are already considered disposable and more deserving of violence by society at large. In particular, Black women face heightened levels of racialized and gendered violence, as they are oftentimes placed on the bottom of the global hierarchy. This violence is mediated by patriarchy and white supremacy, the same forces that say we cannot conform to Eurocentric cisgender standards of beauty.

It is not the responsibility of women of colour to reject Eurocentric white beauty standards. Instead, let us dismantle the oppressive systems of patriarchy, white supremacy, anti-Blackness, colourism, and capitalism. This is not an easy task, because it requires a radical shift in the consciousness of all people and how our institutions operate.

For starters, I do not want to see a tube of Fair and Lovely on my mother’s bathroom countertop in the near future. But to accomplish this we need to have more critical conversations around gender, race, colour and beauty. Still this isn’t enough, for we must organize collectively and demand companies like Unilever to discontinue selling products that contribute to warped ideas of beauty. By preventing companies from profiting from oppression, we can seek the liberation of women of colour across the globe.

You must be to comment.
  1. komal

    This is an overwhelming post !
    I am Indian too and i loved your perception !

    I believe beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder !
    And you are beautiful !


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An ambassador and trained facilitator under Eco Femme (a social enterprise working towards menstrual health in south India), Sanjina is also an active member of the MHM Collective- India and Menstrual Health Alliance- India. She has conducted Menstrual Health sessions in multiple government schools adopted by Rotary District 3240 as part of their WinS project in rural Bengal. She has also delivered training of trainers on SRHR, gender, sexuality and Menstruation for Tomorrow’s Foundation, Vikramshila Education Resource Society, Nirdhan trust and Micro Finance, Tollygunj Women In Need, Paint It Red in Kolkata.

Now as an MH Fellow with YKA, she’s expanding her impressive scope of work further by launching a campaign to facilitate the process of ensuring better menstrual health and SRH services for women residing in correctional homes in West Bengal. The campaign will entail an independent study to take stalk of the present conditions of MHM in correctional homes across the state and use its findings to build public support and political will to take the necessary action.

Saurabh has been associated with YKA as a user and has consistently been writing on the issue MHM and its intersectionality with other issues in the society. Now as an MHM Fellow with YKA, he’s launched the Right to Period campaign, which aims to ensure proper execution of MHM guidelines in Delhi’s schools.

The long-term aim of the campaign is to develop an open culture where menstruation is not treated as a taboo. The campaign also seeks to hold the schools accountable for their responsibilities as an important component in the implementation of MHM policies by making adequate sanitation infrastructure and knowledge of MHM available in school premises.

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Harshita is a psychologist and works to support people with mental health issues, particularly adolescents who are survivors of violence. Associated with the Azadi Foundation in UP, Harshita became an MHM Fellow with YKA, with the aim of promoting better menstrual health.

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Meri Marzi aims to ensure sensitised, non-discriminatory health workers for the needs of female sex workers in the Suraksha Clinics under the UPSACS (Uttar Pradesh State AIDS Control Society) program by creating more dialogues and garnering public support for the cause of sex workers’ menstrual rights. The campaign will also ensure interventions with sex workers to clear misconceptions around overall hygiene management to ensure that results flow both ways.

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MH Fellow Sabna comes with significant experience working with a range of development issues. A co-founder of Project Sakhi Saheli, which aims to combat period poverty and break menstrual taboos, Sabna has, in the past, worked on the issue of menstruation in urban slums of Delhi with women and adolescent girls. She and her team also released MenstraBook, with menstrastories and organised Menstra Tlk in the Delhi School of Social Work to create more conversations on menstruation.

With YKA MHM Fellow Vineet, Sabna launched Menstratalk, a campaign that aims to put an end to period poverty and smash menstrual taboos in society. As a start, the campaign aims to begin conversations on menstrual health with five hundred adolescents and youth in Delhi through offline platforms, and through this community mobilise support to create Period Friendly Institutions out of educational institutes in the city.

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A student from Delhi School of Social work, Vineet is a part of Project Sakhi Saheli, an initiative by the students of Delhi school of Social Work to create awareness on Menstrual Health and combat Period Poverty. Along with MHM Action Fellow Sabna, Vineet launched Menstratalk, a campaign that aims to put an end to period poverty and smash menstrual taboos in society.

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A Computer Science engineer by education, Nitisha started her career in the corporate sector, before realising she wanted to work in the development and social justice space. Since then, she has worked with Teach For India and Care India and is from the founding batch of Indian School of Development Management (ISDM), a one of its kind organisation creating leaders for the development sector through its experiential learning post graduate program.

As a Youth Ki Awaaz Menstrual Health Fellow, Nitisha has started Let’s Talk Period, a campaign to mobilise young people to switch to sustainable period products. She says, “80 lakh women in Delhi use non-biodegradable sanitary products, generate 3000 tonnes of menstrual waste, that takes 500-800 years to decompose; which in turn contributes to the health issues of all menstruators, increased burden of waste management on the city and harmful living environment for all citizens.

Let’s Talk Period aims to change this by

Find out more about her campaign here.

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A former Assistant Secretary with the Ministry of Women and Child Development in West Bengal for three months, Lakshmi Bhavya has been championing the cause of menstrual hygiene in her district. By associating herself with the Lalana Campaign, a holistic menstrual hygiene awareness campaign which is conducted by the Anahat NGO, Lakshmi has been slowly breaking taboos when it comes to periods and menstrual hygiene.

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A Guwahati-based college student pursuing her Masters in Tata Institute of Social Sciences, Bidisha started the #BleedwithDignity campaign on the technology platform, demanding that the Government of Assam install
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