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Things I Need To Say To My ‘Slut-Shaming’ Classmate: “I Am What I Am”
More from Nupur Saraswat
By Nupur Saraswat:
Slut-shaming exists everywhere and dare I say, in colleges more than anywhere else. This narrative has stayed with me for over four years now. Never leaving my mouth, because it had me convinced that it had more to do with my character than theirs. As I graduate next month, I will be four years wiser, and four years surer that this narrative needs to be heard by people everywhere. I know now for sure that slut-shaming is not something I am going to take sitting down and that I will let my abusers know what they did. So, here is a story I want slut-shamers everywhere to read, you know who you are – it’s time to take a f*cking bow.
What does slut-shaming look like? It looks like my freshmen year of college when you decided that you disliked me. In all honesty, I am used to being disliked. I am loud, unconventionally opinionated, and unabashedly bold. I am not a damsel in distress, and thus, I am hard to like.
But this was different. You didn’t dislike me for something that I said to you or something that I did to you. This narrative exists because you disliked me for who I was or, more accurately, who you thought I was. And you thought I was a sexually active 18-year-old Indian girl who was ‘shameless’ enough to talk about her sex life and had the guts to own it unapologetically like everything else that belongs to her. She didn’t ask for your validation. Maybe that’s why you missed how unsure she was of what she was to make of her life. The last thing she needed was another label. A label you gave away so freely and so carelessly – Slut. Thank you.
My existence was an inconvenient truth for you. A truth that dug holes in your stratosphere of patriarchy. It was funny watching you try to duct-tape these gaping holes in your atmosphere. Step one, you blocked me on Facebook, believing, quite like an ostrich, that if you couldn’t see me, I won’t be able to see you. But I did, I saw you try to hang on to what your mother taught you about how a girl should look like. Step two, you tried to make others believe that I am who you say I am. I wonder if your mother will approve of the words you used to describe me. Step three, you stopped going to the parties you thought I would be at, making our mutual friends choose between the two of us. In retrospect, you were doing me a favor, really. You were helping me pick my team – my people. Thank you.
However, you unblocked me a month ago and sent me a fresh friend request. No apology, no explanation. I wish I could say that this was the plot twist, but really it only raises more questions. How compulsively did you think about me before you clicked on ‘Settings’? Were you a changed person when you went to ‘Blocking’? Did you wonder what I had become in these four years before you found my name and hit ‘Unblock’? I have just one more question: how dare you send me a friend request? I didn’t notice you were gone until you came back. But you came back; after four years of people telling me how much you hated me, four years of me asking them why, and four years of dishonest shoulder shruggings.
You see, this story doesn’t have an ending. Much like slut-shaming. I could tell you of the nights I doubted myself out of sleep and into the realms of insomnia. I could tell you of how it furthered my compulsive anxiety. But I won’t. Because I am not a victim. I am a story – and a bloody good one. I am also a slut. An unapologetic one. Thank you.
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The Hulk
Everything you see around you in human civilisation was invented, built and put there by a man. EVERYTHING. If women want to vilify the patriarchy paradigm then they must REJECT all things provided by men. They can’t extract resources by victimhood status at the hands of the patriarchy and simultaneously reap all benefits.
If civilisation was left in female hands, we would still be living in grass huts – Camille Paglia
B
Women are so gullible. First they fell for Torches Of Freedom, and now this. Apparently it is liberating for women to wear miniskirts and cleavage revealing tops, while they constantly keep tugging at their skirts to cover up a bit more, and pull at their tops from the neck to hide their cleavage. Today, women are told by feminists to sexualize themselves in the name of liberation. They are told that in order to be seen as progressive and emancipated, they must dress a certain way. Women today are so systematically and strategically being brainwashed that they don’t even realize it. You must wear whatever you want, in other words, miniskirts, short shorts, backless dresses, tight jeans, low neck tops, spandex pants, etc. The underlying reason why girls face body issues today is because they are told that in order to be accepted by society, they have to have the perfect body. Look at any advertisement today, and not one is complete without showing a semi-clad woman in it, and needless to say, they have nothing to do with the advertisement. It is all about projecting a perfect, toned body of a woman.
Feminists and beauty industries have reduced women to a chattel, where her body is used for financial gain. Sex is a marketing tool. You tell people to have transient sexual relationships in the name of liberation and the profits of companies manufacturing condoms skyrocket. You tell women to dress sexy in the name of emancipation and fashion industries profit by earning billions. Fill women with false notions of beauty, bombard them with pictures of scantily dressed women in fashion shows, TV, billboards, magazines, movies, and music videos, and women start spending heavily on clothes and start using dieting products even at the cost of suffering from anorexia, and today, perfectly young, beautiful girls are lining up for plastic surgery, spending billions in the process. From beauty and contraception to diet and fashion, all industries are earning enormous amounts of money while women remain deluded and continue to pour money into the pockets of those who have infiltrated the minds of women through lies and deceit.
Nupur Saraswat
Hahha hulk you naive thing. You were put here in this world by a woman. So think about that for a sec.
Truth
A woman only loves a man until she finds someone with more money. Most of them today are like the ones shown in Pyaar Ka Panchnama.
kryocken
My response to this post:
https://theindiantenor.wordpress.com/2016/05/15/things-i-need-to-say-to-a-slut/