Just over a week before folks in New Delhi march in the annual Queer Pride Parade, Cake hosted its second ever Twitter chat to talk about celebrating queerness, issues related to public spaces, and inclusiveness. We were joined by the organizers of Delhi Queer Pride, queer media and resource groups, noted activist Harish Iyer, members of the Indian LGBTQ community and allies of the movement, for a full hour of conversation about accessibility, intersectionality, and more. One of the questions we asked was:
Q5: Pride comes once a year. But how can we support our LGBTQ+ friends and fam all year round? #PrideAtCake
— The Cake Official (@thecakeofficial) November 18, 2016
The queer community in India faces multiple forms of marginalization. An earlier survey showed that gay Indian men who had access to personal support systems actually enjoyed a greater degree of safety. And this is true for all queer identities. But support also goes a long way in affirming one’s identity, and creating a sense of collective strength. And these Twitter users had a lot to say about how to build that crucial system.
Both queer Indians and straight allies emphasized the importance of keeping lines of communication open:
By listening. By understanding. By not dismissing us. And remembering that we exist, we’re real and we’re valid. #PrideAtCake https://t.co/FEh5sUtKHJ
— Runa Chatterjee (@RunaChat93) November 18, 2016
@thecakeofficial By being good listeners, knowing when to step back, recognising our privilege every day of the week, twice on Sundays!
— artika raj (@artikaraj) November 18, 2016
The issue of queer erasure – by willful neglect, or just laziness – also had to be challenged:
.@thecakeofficial By coming out as family and friends. Standing up to bullying and invisibilization. #Prideatcake #LGBT
— Sonal Giani (@sumthin_simple) November 18, 2016
And a good way of responding to erasure is this:
We should have #lgbt events throughout the year. Film festivals.. Discussions.. Movie screenings. An all round lgbt culture #prideatcake https://t.co/qXBpKUIfpI
— Gaylaxy (@GaylaxyMagazine) November 18, 2016
by making sure to talk about the ones that are not often talked about every single opportunity we get! Helps create headspace https://t.co/n32rGIrPMK
— Indian Aces (@IndianAces_) November 18, 2016
While some recommended changes on a larger structural level:
Advocating for better policies in general & trying to change mindsets at workplaces and campuses #PrideAtCake https://t.co/ZSiKzYw2dr
— Merril Diniz (@MerrilD) November 18, 2016
@povmumbai @thecakeofficial yes looking at community building events — caring and sustaining communities and our lives
— Dhrubo Jyoti (@dhrubo127) November 18, 2016
@thecakeofficial @povmumbai and not think of queerness as a spectacle but something that runs and entangles our lives and politics
— Dhrubo Jyoti (@dhrubo127) November 18, 2016
@thecakeofficial By making spaces friendlier for them and giving them representation. It’ll make LGBT culture mainstream. #PrideAtCake
— Sourodipto Sanyal (@Sourodipto1) November 18, 2016
Others had tips for making our everyday interactions more sensitive:
@thecakeofficial Being an ally requires work. Be sensitive, listen, stand up for them. And avoid microaggressions!
— Sexuality&Disability (@dis_sexuality) November 18, 2016
@thecakeofficial Support those who come out to you. Don’t out them, don’t ask insulting questions, don’t make fun of them. #PrideAtCake
— Point of View (@povmumbai) November 18, 2016
@thecakeofficial High time to begin calling out peeps who make politically incorrect “gay” jokes- don’t become part of it! #PrideAtCake
— Nitya Sriram (@SriramNitya) November 18, 2016
@thecakeofficial Not being dismissive of their struggles or slighting them. Recognizing power of privilege and using it to create dialogue.
— Agents of Ishq (@AgentsofIshq) November 18, 2016
@thecakeofficial if you are indeed confused about anything about the community. Simply ask, instead of making assumptions. #prideatcake
— Anusha Yadav (@anushayadav) November 18, 2016
Another important reminder was to break down imagined boundaries:
Just dont “support”. Just understand that there is no “you” and “they”. There’s just “US” and “WE” https://t.co/hEGPkwjPrb
— harish iyer (@hiyer) November 18, 2016
@edutom1995 Perhaps we should strive for having no ‘mainstream’ and no ‘margins’. #PrideAtCake
— Abhishek Jha (@abhi5285) November 18, 2016
Claim culture that has long been and continues to be heteronormative! #PrideAtCake https://t.co/bRshOHjN7V
— Edwin Thomas (@edutom1995) November 18, 2016
@thecakeofficial acknowledge privilege. Give up space. Dance like no tomorrow.
— Manak Matiyani (@Dafliwala) November 18, 2016
Several other really cool things came up during the chat, like the fact that Bangalore Pride will be disability-friendly this year, or that more and more Indian cities are now organizing Pride Parades. It also raised several important tips for straight allies, and newcomers at Pride events. The chat ended on a bright note, now that we’re all armed with more evolving and nuanced perspectives, just in time for Delhi’s ninth annual Pride march on November 27, 2016.