The Other Side To “Devoteeism”

Posted by Swapnil Sampat in Disability Rights, Society
December 30, 2016

Recently I read an article on this website regarding “devoteeism”. I was shocked at what people actually think about anyone who likes people with disabilities. Devoteeism refers to having a sexual desire for people with disabilities. Well, there are many people on social media who only want to be in sexual relations with people having disabilities but that is not the conclusion of the argument. There is another side of the coin too which I would like to put forward here.

If anyone, as a person with disability, asks a devotee to marry them, chances are high that they will refuse or come up with some nonsense excuse. And these are the bad fish that spoil the entire pond. But what about those people who are actually willing to understand, love and even spend their life with a person having disabilities? These people do exist.

People often ask why someone would be interested in persons with disabilities. They say that no ‘normal’ boy will ever accept a girl with disability, so anyone who says that they like people with disabilities only wants to have sexual relations or exploit the weakness of a person.

So is it a crime to love a person with disability (PWD) or have a special feeling for them? It’s been more than 6 years that I realised I had this different sort of liking. Initially, I was quite confused about these feelings that I had developed. But with experience came maturity and I gradually realised that there existed a world of people who have feelings for persons with disabilities. Going by the definition of “Devoteeism”, people who have genuine feelings for PWD are NOT DEVOTEES. Let me stress on the word NOT as much as I can so that I am not misunderstood here as well. And ask yourself, are all of us not inclined to have special feelings for people with certain attributes? There are always some people for whom we develop feelings, isn’t it? Maybe that’s the answer why someone would have special feelings for persons with disabilities.

I have come across a large number of people, no one even cares to even listen to you once they come to know you are having feelings for PWD. But I recently met a girl with disability on a social media platform and I told her about myself asking her if she would be my friend. She agreed and she became the first person ever to tell me that she wanted to understand what I felt and wanted to listen to my story. Initially, I was worried but then ended up telling her everything. Since that day I lost contact with her maybe because I couldn’t explain myself or maybe she had already made up her mind like others that anyone who has a liking towards disabilities is a pervert. If the people with disabilities say that they are not accepted in the world of normal people then similarly those who have special feelings for them are not accepted in their world.

Readers, please do mention your views on this topic in the comment section. I would be glad to know your opinions. Thank You!

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