There are highs and there are lows, especially if you do something for the first time. For you to do something you haven’t done earlier, there needs to be a greater degree of self-confidence. There are times when things can go horribly wrong and you can’t do anything apart from staring your way into oblivion. There have been times when things have slipped out of hand. Whenever such situations have arrived, I’ve just kept my head down and said, “Okay, I’ll find a way out.”
Remaining firm really helps you at times because confidence alone, is a fickle companion, perhaps the ficklest of them all. You need to have a need for recognition, constant reassurance and a never-ending hope that it won’t desert you. My relationship with it hasn’t been dissimilar.
Honestly, it’s a never-ending process. Initially, when a decline in confidence occurs, a lot of it is related to the stress and the so-called ‘negative energy’ that is created around you and the things you need to refrain yourself from being a part of. It’s a really natural thing that people like to criticise more than they like to support and admire.
It is not about taking a dig at someone, it’s more about stating a fact. Even while having leisurely conversations, people like to get involved in talking negatively about someone really quickly. Talking about someone very positively ends within 10 minutes. You don’t have anything to say after 10-12 minutes. Obviously, you can’t keep harping about a person for long, but you can certainly keep going on when you’re criticising someone. Many consider it to be a great way of passing (rather killing) time.
Well, I think as youngsters, we tend to succumb to them. All of us want to do well, you want to make a name for yourself, but a blow to confidence at a young age is, at times, difficult to recover from. When things don’t happen, an individual can stoop down to a level of confidence which can be really devastating. Not many people realise how badly criticism can hit a person. It can ruin a person’s life if they fail to find a way out of it.
People have gone into depression, they can go into depression and it happens to be a really tricky state of affairs. I’ve gone through those times. What I’ve learnt from them is the fact that failures are nothing but an opportunity to learn. It’s never really about trying to prove anyone wrong or going too hard on myself for failing to perform. There are days when I perform way better than what is expected of me. There are days when I perform below par. All of these are nothing but a part of the learning curve. you just need to be patient and go through the grinding with a belief that grinding too, is a part of a bigger process called learning.
Acceptance holds the key here. You need to accept that this, also is a phase that’s bound to come. You need to deal with it. Sometimes, nervousness and press get the better of you, but that is how situations pan out. Things just don’t go the way you want them to go and that is how things are. Those are the times you need to hang in there and realise that failures are important for your own growth.
Mental strength is something that has always been very-very important. I would break it down 70-30 (Mental:physical). The mental side of things has got tougher because we happen to be doing 10 different things at the same time. Work’s a never-ending process. You have to keep performing, you just can’t sit there and wait for things to happen.
Once the hard yards in life are done, the going doesn’t get easier by an inch. There are mood swings at times, but you need to keep the energy going. Melancholy at times, ends up getting the better of you, but you just need to keep your head down and bear it. If you succeed, celebrate. If you fail, just learn from the experience.