‘Social skills’ are the ‘foundation’ of every single ‘relationship’ that you have in your life – it pertains to your ‘friends’, ‘family’, your ‘boss’, ‘coworkers’, ‘acquaintances’ and ‘everyone in between’.
Sadly, it seems that these days, people lack ‘basic foundations’ – from having ‘small talk’ with the people around them, to staying ‘connected’ long enough with someone to develop a ‘meaningful friendship’.
In my last article, “The Dishonesty In Today’s Dating World”, I touched on some fairly ‘scary’ thoughts about where ‘social media’ is heading – and why it’s time for people to see the truth behind these ‘(anti) social networks’.
When was the last time you talked to a stranger at a party, or a social event? Were you greeted with ‘warmth’, or a ‘feeling’ that someone was trying to get back into their ‘Instagram-ing’ or ‘Facebook-ing’, rather than having a conversation? It is more than likely that it was the latter. It’s a problem that’s becoming more prevalent today, and it is quite alarming that it’s not being taken as seriously as it should be.
Isn’t it just a little obnoxious that everyone always has so little time, yet spend hours looking through photos of other people, and peeping into their personal lives?
In fact, there’s actual evidence out there that social media is likely to make us more prone to ‘depression’, and also make us more ‘anti-social’ and ‘unhappier’ in general.
So what’s the solution?
It’s not easy to give a solution when so few people really understand the impact that social media has on our brains – on literally a ‘physiological’, as well as ’emotional’ level. That’s right – social media is quite literally a ‘drug’ that produces the same kinds of ‘reactions’ (releasing ‘dopamine’, the ‘feel-good chemical’) in our brains – thereby making us more dependent on it for our ‘happiness’.
However, if anyone is really willing to pay attention – and wishes to develop their ‘social skills’ – how about putting the phone down for a minute, and just having a ‘small chat’ with someone at the grocery store? Or making plans to ‘catch’ up with old friends? Or even just ‘consciously turning off’ Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, or whatever other social network you use and simply ‘pay attention’ to the people around you?
It can really be such a ‘simple’, yet ‘rewarding’ thing to do – who knew having an ‘actual conversation’ could be so ‘interesting’? There is also the ‘skill’ part about it – this takes time to develop. As a real estate agent in the ‘real world’, developing ‘charisma’, ‘personal magnetism’, and ‘confidence’ was a huge ‘change’ that I pursued relentlessly. But it is a ‘real life skill’ that has paid for itself many times over – considering I was such a shy child all throughout high school.
But if I could advise a ‘general rule’ to start applying in your everyday life immediately – it’s to not just count the minutes until you can check your notifications again. Make it a goal to be the ‘most interesting person’ in the room!