1800-exam-helpline

Posted by Akshaya Parthasarathy
February 22, 2017

Self-Published

We know when that helpline blings, that can only mean one thing, The boards are less than a month away!
Have you ever gotten a jaw-dropping 95 on your science test in 5th grade but now a 45 seems like you’ve achieved greatness?

Have you been surrounded by random phone-calls in the past month asking you what you plan to do with your life, but preferably become a doctor or an engineer?

Are you still not convinced that these numbers on paper are the only thing that will shape your entire life?

Well, you’ve come to the right place.

1800-Exam-Helpline brings to you the solution to all your worries for this entire month.

No, we’re not just going send you a box of heavy study guides and no, we are definitely not going to provide counseling about your career options(Pfft, what options?)

We are going to provide you with so much more, read along and find out which package you require!

The schedule package plans out your study timetable, your revision time table, your double revision timetable, and if time allows, your drinking water time table.

The latest addition to all this is a pre-recorded audio set that caters to whatever you have to listen, thereby saving you from any kind of human interaction!

Feeling mentally down and unable to think straight? Here’s a voice recording that will constantly tell you “You’re just being lazy. There’s no such thing as a mental breakdown.”

Alone? Haven’t hung out with your friends since 1996?

“These friends and all are only going to be there till school. Your mark sheet is your true companion.”

Moreover, we’re gonna throw in a set of flashcards for free! Now these are not just normal flashcards, each card contains questions that should never pop up in your mind, such as:

“How is this ever going to help me in my future?”

“But what if I don’t want to do what others want me to do?”

“Do these marks even matter?”

Read these a couple of times and you’ll realize that there are such things as, silly questions.

We are not going to stop until you can solve an entire board paper, while blind-folded!

You CAN pass with flying colors! You CAN juggle 5 subjects! You CAN get into one of the top colleges.

These are all the things that you can, but what about all the things that you want?

What if you wanted to sing your heart out and play music because you’ve always been scared to do so?

What if you wanted to dance like nobody’s watching because that’s where you find your sense of freedom?

What if you wanted to travel the world and just be happy?

What if you just wanted to sleep?

Well, thank us for the “Un-DayDreamer” package, we’ll make sure your silly wants are just insignificant.

Call now and you can get all this, not for $29.99, not $19.99, not even $9.99!

It’s just for the price of your sanity.

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