Our Reaction To Karan Johar Becoming A Father Shows How Closeted Our Society Is

Posted by Nidhi Lanka in Society, Taboos
March 7, 2017

A Medical Student’s Perspective:

Besides being a student of the medical sciences, I am also a raging Karan Johar fan. The news that the director had become a father through the marvels of medical science was satisfying to say the least. For the greater part, I was wildly jubilant.

This is exactly why I was utterly aghast when I came across people actually trolling him on this occasion. The social stigma attached to infertility, though abhorrent, was at least expected. But mean trolls? Come on, have a heart! Then again, I’m not really surprised. Remember Taimur, anyone?

My angst against these people is based on two grounds:

Firstly, on a personal note, how cruel can we be as a nation?

Here’s a man who can’t even have a legitimate relationship in this nation – forget having kids conceived through natural means! His ‘choices’ are to either move to a country which is more tolerant to his ‘kind’, leaving behind all the hard work and legacy, or be jailed in his loving nation. And yet, a certain section of society blames him for the choice he made in such a situation!

Secondly, as a medical student, I would ask the people who condemn surrogacy (whenever they hear of it) to ‘grow up’. Stop hushing curious kids and stop lowering your voices while congratulating the ‘lucky’ (or ‘unlucky’) parents. The sweets presented should be as ‘sweet’, and the celebrations as unapologetic, as they generally are in the case of a so-called ‘normally delivered’ baby.

Why are the lessons on reproduction and sexual health kept under wraps before the public? Discussions and lessons on issues like menstruation and safe sex are practically taboo when it comes to the Indian public.

Being sterile does not mean that your wife is ‘defective’ or that your masculinity is ‘deficient’. By no means should children be dissuaded from knowing about things like condoms. I’ve come across kids who’ve somehow been taught that it’s a ‘bad word’. Does this even make sense? Will these words be of any use if someone contracts a sexually transmitted disease (STD), or is victim to some other eventuality?

If you can be happy for Monica’s twins on “Friends”, then stop being a hypocrite and stop mocking the pados waali (neighborhood) ‘queer’ aunty’s kids! You will also definitely be happy for Karan Johar’s Roohi and Yash!

His movies may be self-admittedly ‘bubblegum and popcorn’. His talk-show may be funny and frivolous, and he may always have this affable, impish grin. However, what comes across on deeper inspection, especially in his autobiography, “An Unsuitable Boy”, is a certain ‘vulnerable loneliness’, and a fear of growing old alone. Are we really so cruel as to deny him – and all those like him – a chance to combat this fear and loneliness?

When it comes to his sexuality, I don’t know if Karan Johar will ever come out of the closet. When it comes to sex and surrogacy, however, I do know that we as a society are quite ‘safely closeted’!

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