This is a short lyrical story of any or every Individual who just go through this everyday. How does it feel to be alone, depressed and rejected.There are people who can’t or don’t want to show the world what they are going through..so just don’t kill yourself within.Say your pain to yourself and pen all that down.Here is the story…
I won’t hide those letters,those secret letters of lies
Where I mention your name, fall for you..
and say that I love you..
And I myself write your imaginary replies..
I won’t wish they will be called suicidal notes..
Just in case if I am gone before you even know…
Coz I have fallen for you after dying thousand times
I gathered these smiles after sleepless nights
It ain’t no utopian love,I never knew this could be it
It’s chewing me up,it’s spitting me out
I am trying so hard,like I never tried
I am crying so louder,may be once I cried
I am hiding my face across all the corners
But these walls are hitting me to fall
Even though they have heard and seen it all
And then I don’t blame them at all
Coz there are humans who know it all
I used to think you are the silent angel of my life
Who would hold me whenever I fall
And sometimes when I get chocked up I think I should call..
But all I do is looking at your number and scroll
And throw my phone away coz the voice on the other side
Would be a total lie,just to comfort the night
I think you would find one day
These letters somewhere around my grave
No point of you reading them when I am gone,
I won’t be here to see your regretful eyes or may be not around
Coz I don’t believe in life after death,when you are alive and already dead
Oh by the way,I am unsure would you even cry
And even if you cry,there would be that guy to pull you closer
Your friends would tell you that you lost a looser
Your mumma might give you a hug,
You would go out and get yourself a beer mug..
Your lovers or haters or may be just hookups
Would give you the pleasure may be for a week or two
And then like always you would do..
Hunt for new ones ,sweeping off the old souls
And getting paced up ahead ,crushing one towards you, who crawls
I can’t complain,about all this pain
Coz I gathered it all my own…
But may be someday if you ever will……
Leave it coz I know you never will
© nikkhilverma