This post has been self-published on Youth Ki Awaaz by Sadiya Khan. Just like them, anyone can publish on Youth Ki Awaaz.

Good Girl

More from Sadiya Khan

Who we consider a ‘Good girl’??
On what parameters the goodness of a girl is measured?
Do we need a criteria for it?
Or we need definition to a good girl..?

Several questions hit my head when it comes to ‘Stereotype’ of a girl..
Society standards have set certain ‘stereotypes’ for a Girl..

Living in an patriarchal society these stereotypes are handed over to us as legacies and some are created fresh by our own

A Society which preach tolerance and hates being judged.. consider a Girl GOOD who is quiet,shy, doesnt speaks too much and holds no opinion to anything!

The ‘good girl’ label comes with a lot of wrong notions..about a girl’s character, intelligence and interests.

A girl is supposed to look pretty, and is considered weak.

Any small tiny thing like pencil is considered feminine,
While a strong one considered MALE!
Though very minor but these sterotypes hold great plays in our society.

Stereotyopes begin the moment a baby’s gender is found out…

The moment we know its a baby girl.. We start filling her closets with pink ,frilly dresses and her toy box with tea set and dolls.

We start making her ‘girly’.

What this is essentially doing,
even though many parents do not realize it.. It is setting the child to be the ‘perfect lady’, and teaching her how to be the stereotypical woman.

In a very young age, she is well aware with it that she is gonna marry.. And is supposed to stay at home with her baby while husband goes to work.

They are supposed to do ‘clean jobs’ like teachers, secreterians,nursing, doctors.

They are supposed to make less money than men…
Best women sit at home, being house mums.. Doing all household chores!

They are meant to be submissive and do as they are told,

They are quiet and are not meant to speak out…

Parents never say they are going to make out a independent ‘Tom boy’ out of their girl.
They rarely make a girl to live on her own terms and conditions
The society doesnt let them!!

A general typical assumption is made in our society for girls,

A Girl is not thought to live single and independently..
She is made to live with a guy somehow for whole her life!

She is never in charge of her stands!!

She is never given the space to express her physical desires..

A girl approaching a guy is not the ‘stereotype’ of a good girl..
Proposing is assigned for males.

A girl who drinks,smokes, do drugs, do sex, having numerous male friends, wears crop tops with high- waisted shorts is not considered good.
While a boy is considered a Cool dude on doing this.

She is supposed to wear a purity ring before her marriage, representating her commitment to the chastity before marriage.

A shy girl, Who lacks the spirit of expressing herself ..not holding considerable confidence..not having a boyfriend ..
Who never got intimate..
Is considered a girl perfect to get marry with!!

These may be the choices of a girl but they are not supposed to be limited boundaries to her life!

Either way, generalising girls across the spectrum is not fair.

She is not supposed to be caged in a spectrum making out herself a ‘typical’.

Just becoz she Rides bike, plays football,
becoz she is your COOL bro, makes her no less than a girl!

If she cracks double meaning jokes then it doesn’t mean she is sexual intent with you!!

And yes!!! FOREVER ALONE holds true for girls as well,
When a girl says she is single, it doesnt necessarily mean she is looking out for a relationship!
Its not a cue for you guys to start hitting on her!!

Being a girl, Doesnt mean she must know how to cook!

Well ..she is strong enough to take on her responsibilities!!
Dont be over-protective or over-possesive to her.
Let her take her stands whatever they are!

If She is bold enough to express herself and considerably outspoken that doesnt mean she will sleep out with you in less than seconds!

A girl being open about her physical desires doesnt mean she is intended to sex with each and every guy!!
It doesnt certify her being bad!

And who is a good girl..??

What is the mental opinion out there judging goods and bads!!

Does the way i get dressed, speak and act really reflect who i am?
Or i am merely mimicking the stereotype!!?

Going a step ahead of your girly lines.. live with dignity and do realise true worth of yourself!!

Dont be a slave to limitations set out for you!!
Speak up! Dress up however you want! Be single!! Be strong!! Say exactly what you want!
You are not meant to wear pink and speak are not meant to have a dependent relation!
Join politics, join leadership, you are not meant to be lost in marriage.
You are not meant to upbring your children only!

And so You are not meant to be bound up in STEREOTYPES!!

Youth Ki Awaaz is an open platform where anybody can publish. This post does not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions.

You must be to comment.

More from Sadiya Khan

Similar Posts


By revivegold

By Hemant Thakur

Wondering what to write about?

Here are some topics to get you started

Share your details to download the report.

We promise not to spam or send irrelevant information.

Share your details to download the report.

We promise not to spam or send irrelevant information.

An ambassador and trained facilitator under Eco Femme (a social enterprise working towards menstrual health in south India), Sanjina is also an active member of the MHM Collective- India and Menstrual Health Alliance- India. She has conducted Menstrual Health sessions in multiple government schools adopted by Rotary District 3240 as part of their WinS project in rural Bengal. She has also delivered training of trainers on SRHR, gender, sexuality and Menstruation for Tomorrow’s Foundation, Vikramshila Education Resource Society, Nirdhan trust and Micro Finance, Tollygunj Women In Need, Paint It Red in Kolkata.

Now as an MH Fellow with YKA, she’s expanding her impressive scope of work further by launching a campaign to facilitate the process of ensuring better menstrual health and SRH services for women residing in correctional homes in West Bengal. The campaign will entail an independent study to take stalk of the present conditions of MHM in correctional homes across the state and use its findings to build public support and political will to take the necessary action.

Saurabh has been associated with YKA as a user and has consistently been writing on the issue MHM and its intersectionality with other issues in the society. Now as an MHM Fellow with YKA, he’s launched the Right to Period campaign, which aims to ensure proper execution of MHM guidelines in Delhi’s schools.

The long-term aim of the campaign is to develop an open culture where menstruation is not treated as a taboo. The campaign also seeks to hold the schools accountable for their responsibilities as an important component in the implementation of MHM policies by making adequate sanitation infrastructure and knowledge of MHM available in school premises.

Read more about his campaign.

Harshita is a psychologist and works to support people with mental health issues, particularly adolescents who are survivors of violence. Associated with the Azadi Foundation in UP, Harshita became an MHM Fellow with YKA, with the aim of promoting better menstrual health.

Her campaign #MeriMarzi aims to promote menstrual health and wellness, hygiene and facilities for female sex workers in UP. She says, “Knowledge about natural body processes is a very basic human right. And for individuals whose occupation is providing sexual services, it becomes even more important.”

Meri Marzi aims to ensure sensitised, non-discriminatory health workers for the needs of female sex workers in the Suraksha Clinics under the UPSACS (Uttar Pradesh State AIDS Control Society) program by creating more dialogues and garnering public support for the cause of sex workers’ menstrual rights. The campaign will also ensure interventions with sex workers to clear misconceptions around overall hygiene management to ensure that results flow both ways.

Read more about her campaign.

MH Fellow Sabna comes with significant experience working with a range of development issues. A co-founder of Project Sakhi Saheli, which aims to combat period poverty and break menstrual taboos, Sabna has, in the past, worked on the issue of menstruation in urban slums of Delhi with women and adolescent girls. She and her team also released MenstraBook, with menstrastories and organised Menstra Tlk in the Delhi School of Social Work to create more conversations on menstruation.

With YKA MHM Fellow Vineet, Sabna launched Menstratalk, a campaign that aims to put an end to period poverty and smash menstrual taboos in society. As a start, the campaign aims to begin conversations on menstrual health with five hundred adolescents and youth in Delhi through offline platforms, and through this community mobilise support to create Period Friendly Institutions out of educational institutes in the city.

Read more about her campaign. 

A student from Delhi School of Social work, Vineet is a part of Project Sakhi Saheli, an initiative by the students of Delhi school of Social Work to create awareness on Menstrual Health and combat Period Poverty. Along with MHM Action Fellow Sabna, Vineet launched Menstratalk, a campaign that aims to put an end to period poverty and smash menstrual taboos in society.

As a start, the campaign aims to begin conversations on menstrual health with five hundred adolescents and youth in Delhi through offline platforms, and through this community mobilise support to create Period Friendly Institutions out of educational institutes in the city.

Find out more about the campaign here.

A native of Bhagalpur district – Bihar, Shalini Jha believes in equal rights for all genders and wants to work for a gender-equal and just society. In the past she’s had a year-long association as a community leader with Haiyya: Organise for Action’s Health Over Stigma campaign. She’s pursuing a Master’s in Literature with Ambedkar University, Delhi and as an MHM Fellow with YKA, recently launched ‘Project अल्हड़ (Alharh)’.

She says, “Bihar is ranked the lowest in India’s SDG Index 2019 for India. Hygienic and comfortable menstruation is a basic human right and sustainable development cannot be ensured if menstruators are deprived of their basic rights.” Project अल्हड़ (Alharh) aims to create a robust sensitised community in Bhagalpur to collectively spread awareness, break the taboo, debunk myths and initiate fearless conversations around menstruation. The campaign aims to reach at least 6000 adolescent girls from government and private schools in Baghalpur district in 2020.

Read more about the campaign here.

A psychologist and co-founder of a mental health NGO called Customize Cognition, Ritika forayed into the space of menstrual health and hygiene, sexual and reproductive healthcare and rights and gender equality as an MHM Fellow with YKA. She says, “The experience of working on MHM/SRHR and gender equality has been an enriching and eye-opening experience. I have learned what’s beneath the surface of the issue, be it awareness, lack of resources or disregard for trans men, who also menstruate.”

The Transmen-ses campaign aims to tackle the issue of silence and disregard for trans men’s menstruation needs, by mobilising gender sensitive health professionals and gender neutral restrooms in Lucknow.

Read more about the campaign here.

A Computer Science engineer by education, Nitisha started her career in the corporate sector, before realising she wanted to work in the development and social justice space. Since then, she has worked with Teach For India and Care India and is from the founding batch of Indian School of Development Management (ISDM), a one of its kind organisation creating leaders for the development sector through its experiential learning post graduate program.

As a Youth Ki Awaaz Menstrual Health Fellow, Nitisha has started Let’s Talk Period, a campaign to mobilise young people to switch to sustainable period products. She says, “80 lakh women in Delhi use non-biodegradable sanitary products, generate 3000 tonnes of menstrual waste, that takes 500-800 years to decompose; which in turn contributes to the health issues of all menstruators, increased burden of waste management on the city and harmful living environment for all citizens.

Let’s Talk Period aims to change this by

Find out more about her campaign here.

Share your details to download the report.

We promise not to spam or send irrelevant information.

A former Assistant Secretary with the Ministry of Women and Child Development in West Bengal for three months, Lakshmi Bhavya has been championing the cause of menstrual hygiene in her district. By associating herself with the Lalana Campaign, a holistic menstrual hygiene awareness campaign which is conducted by the Anahat NGO, Lakshmi has been slowly breaking taboos when it comes to periods and menstrual hygiene.

A Gender Rights Activist working with the tribal and marginalized communities in india, Srilekha is a PhD scholar working on understanding body and sexuality among tribal girls, to fill the gaps in research around indigenous women and their stories. Srilekha has worked extensively at the grassroots level with community based organisations, through several advocacy initiatives around Gender, Mental Health, Menstrual Hygiene and Sexual and Reproductive Health Rights (SRHR) for the indigenous in Jharkhand, over the last 6 years.

Srilekha has also contributed to sustainable livelihood projects and legal aid programs for survivors of sex trafficking. She has been conducting research based programs on maternal health, mental health, gender based violence, sex and sexuality. Her interest lies in conducting workshops for young people on life skills, feminism, gender and sexuality, trauma, resilience and interpersonal relationships.

A Guwahati-based college student pursuing her Masters in Tata Institute of Social Sciences, Bidisha started the #BleedwithDignity campaign on the technology platform, demanding that the Government of Assam install
biodegradable sanitary pad vending machines in all government schools across the state. Her petition on has already gathered support from over 90000 people and continues to grow.

Bidisha was selected in’s flagship program ‘She Creates Change’ having run successful online advocacy
campaigns, which were widely recognised. Through the #BleedwithDignity campaign; she organised and celebrated World Menstrual Hygiene Day, 2019 in Guwahati, Assam by hosting a wall mural by collaborating with local organisations. The initiative was widely covered by national and local media, and the mural was later inaugurated by the event’s chief guest Commissioner of Guwahati Municipal Corporation (GMC) Debeswar Malakar, IAS.

Sign up for the Youth Ki Awaaz Prime Ministerial Brief below