Raped behind the doors

Posted by Tanya Mishra
June 8, 2017

NOTE: This post has been self-published by the author. Anyone can write on Youth Ki Awaaz.

We had just shifted in this new house in a beautiful colony . Just like any other  newly wedded couple , we were perfect at least that’s what people thought.  Ladies in the colony would often tell me that they were jealous to see how my husband cared for me, loved me so much .  Some 3 months later my neighbour  saw him putting a red bindi on my forehead and imidiately  said that I  was really blessed to have such a loving husband . I could only smile. Yes all I could  do was smile for her words felt like a taunt to me . No one was aware of the pain I was going through.

One night he came home late. He was drunk  . I was lying on my side of the bed when he suddenly pulled my leg and dragged me out of the bed. He started to kiss me and press my body , piercing his nails into my back and front . I begged  and cried but he did not stop  until he wass fully satisfied.   He forcefully removed my saree and unhooked my blouse . He felt pride  in removing my cloths and enjoyed seeing me naked. He  forced me to make love to him even when I didn’t feel like doing so. He sexually assaulted me ,exploited me , yes he raped me every single night  and all I could do was scream and plead him to leave me alone. The more I cried and screamed ,the more he enjoyed   . Many times I gathered courage and said no but that day he would make it more painful for me. My pain was his pleasure. I tried my best to stop it in the early days itself but he would beat me. That’s the reason we kept changing our house . I  have had 2 miscarriages in past 6 months .

I  was not okay.  I was forced to do something i was not ready to do. When I questioned myself looking into the mirror, why I was tolerating all of this ,the only answer I got was , ” because I am married to him. Because I had no courage to fight back ..”  I was unable to express my pain and shate my problems anyone. All I desired was freedom. Freedom from this never ending pain and insult . I wanted to end it all.
I was a well educated lady, belonging to a well reputed family and married to an extremely successful businessman and still was been exploited.

My neighbours by now knew what was happening with me and thus we shifted again. I knew no one  could  help me .

Maybe she was right . No one could have helped her.  It was only she who could help her get out of a relationship that gave her nothing but pain. Marital rape is rape and nothing can justify it. Sadly the Indian Penal Code section 375 which addresses the crime of rape has no law for marital rape. It is still legal in India.  But  the statistics say that women are 40 times more likely to be assaulted by their husbands than a stranger. Living in a patriarchal society woman are bound to be a victim of such a crime . It is high time the law makers take a step towards making reforms and changes in this direction.  Give it a thought. Are we women really just a pleasure toy that parents give to their sons ? How can we so comfortably turn Blind to such a cruel act ?? Will you be ready to see your daughter ,mother ,sister ,or a friend in such a relationship? I am a woman and I deserve to live freely . Sexually interaction should be my choice . No one , I repeat no one has a right to force me. Rape is rape whether done on road or at home. A man has no right to force himself on his wife without her permission.  Just because you have more physical  strength doesn’t make you a man . If you have no strength to accept and acknowledge a woman’s “NO” you surely are no man . Stand against marital rape . Raise your voice for you will not only save yourself but many others too. Take A Stand !!!

Youth Ki Awaaz is an open platform where anybody can publish. This post does not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions.