If i make love to you?

Posted by Chetanya Kapoor
July 7, 2017

NOTE: This post has been self-published by the author. Anyone can write on Youth Ki Awaaz.

After a tiresome day at work I come back home to my lovely wife.

She who is the love of my life,

and I have vowed to protect as we walked down the aisle.

I open the bedroom door and there beautiful she lie.

But something seems off tonight.

Her face doesn’t seem to carry the usual smile.

She gets up I hug her tight.

I pull her close and keep my hands above her waist and place it just right.

I kiss and point towards the bed.

She gets the hint that I am asking that can we do it tonight.

She drags herself and holds me tight,

My husband she whispers not tonight.

She tells she has cramps.

And her body feels like deer caged in traps.

But sullen before she finished her sentence.

I had already pranced.

By the time she said a “no”.

I was halfway through undressing her.

Her body could take no more.

She pushed me a little and shouted “stop”

Was it even loving anymore?

My mind baffled unable to comprehend.

What did I fail to understand?

Am I or am I not her loving caring husband?

I was about to make love.

But was it really love that I was about to make?

And then suddenly it hit me hard.

Day before an article I read “marital rape” it said.

My heart felt the quake.

Could it be I was one of the snake?

My heart sank.

My eyes felt heavy.

I gathered all the courage and looked at her weary.

But I was surprised to look at her plight.

It seemed as if her eyes were about to apologise.

Saying she was sorry to have her period on a Saturday night!

But was it her fault or her fight?

She looked at me and said,

Dear husband we can do it tonight.

Sullen! Why would she say this after all pain and fright?

Then I realised,

All her life she was made to realise.

Love was an emotion

But making love was an obligation.

Society has taught her,

Marriage and harassment put together are an illusion.

Fairy tales are big delusion.

“no” in a marriage is his right and her unprovided solution.

Her own mother has told her,

“It’s your duty to work for your spouse” my dear daughter.

Your “no” in bed is a joke without laughter.

But I was her lover?

And vowed to be her protector?

But do I protect or it’s me she needs to be protected.

I stand and stare.

Oh! My love you deserve so much care.

I kissed her forehead.

And placed her in bed.

I vowed to be a “husband” in life ahead.

I sincerely apologise for not to understand.

“No” be it your or mine.

It needs to be respected great and fine.

Today I know I wasn’t a true masculine.

But I promise tomorrow I’ll be yours and you’ll be mine.


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