I often walk the streets where a random kid, No! not a random kid but a random poor street kid just come towards me and asks me to give him anything whether be it a coin or piece of food that I may be eating at that time. Sometimes I do give him something, but most of the time I just shoo them away. I often think why should I give 10 or 5 Rupee to anyone? whenever my parents gave anything to any beggar the value was nothing more than 1 or 2 Rupee. all-though, we were more generous when it came to food. what good will a 1 Rs. coin will do to a kid? what will he do? He will go to his ring-master and will give him his income and in return he will get drugs or whatever that the ring master uses to ensure his source of income remains his only.
Then these images started to just get in my head. I just can’t stop thinking about them. why I am not like them? why I am not in their place? Is it true that whatever you do in this life has an effect on your incarnation? does your good deeds in present life makes sure that you are born as a human in respectable conditions in the next life?
It’s just random things happening at random instances of time and I am overthinking?
Why I am not in their place? Why that kid is not in my shoes?
Why is that I don’t have to think even once if I want to eat something good or expensive. But these kids have to struggle and think gazillions times even to get a slice of anything eatable?
To many why’s and not so many answers!
The only answer I can think of is that everything is random, you only control a part of it. you don’t decide where you will be born, you don’t choose your parents.
A certain part of this abstractness you can control. you can control what you want to be, your career, your thoughts and your actions.
But can you control your place of birth? or the way you die? In between life and death , certain randomness can be put on a lease.
I often wonder, what if that kid is more talented than me? He is not getting a fair chance. my struggle is my study and what I want to be.
His struggle is one time meal.
If he can not cross that level, how could he compete at my level? even if he is more talented, his life will be limited to finding food and this will be only because long before he was born two people were really messed up and one couldn’t control his feelings and can not afford things costing only Rs.20 and bang! just like that!
It would be really amazing if someone would have asked us “where do you want to be born?” !
I often walk these streets and come across these so called unwanted childrens. i often come across the fact that how people can easily waste Rs. 20 on a cigarette or a junk food they like. But, when it comes to giving only Rs. 5 they think over it and most of them just ignore these kids.
I always wonder what good have i done?
What bad did they do?