‘Bigdi Hui’ because I dared!

Posted by Manvi Singh in #BHL
September 24, 2017
Editor's note: This post is a part of #BHL, a campaign by BBC Media Action and Youth Ki Awaaz to redefine and own the label of what a 'bigda hua ladka or ladki' really is. If you believe in making your own choices and smashing this stereotype, share your story.

“Kapde aur chote kar leti (why don’t you wear even shorter clothes, now?) I wonder what you’d do with your clothes once you start going to college,” My aunt remarks as I pass by the main door of my house for my friend’s birthday party.

“You better become soft-spoken, girls ain’t allowed to speak like that.” Says another, when I own a high-end tone to my voice.

“Don’t you think you should start listening to others? You won’t get to boss around once you’re married.”

I wonder how long the list goes for the code of conduct of a girl. From clothes, a developed attitude and something as natural as the pitch of her voice – our beloved society wishes to govern everything. I wonder why they don’t call a robot a girl or a girl a robot, that would work according to their commands and expectations – a list of expectations which will not come to a full stop.

I was captivated with such expectations, to live according to the commands and demands of my father, until the day I decided to dream.

Dreams. You don’t hold a grip to them, especially not the ones you see wide-eyed, yet you are barred. You’re supposed to do what you’re asked to do. And I was asked to become a doctor. But, I decided to let go of expectations and follow my dreams.

And once I picked up that pen to write, my society instantly said, “Yeh ladki ab bigad gayi hain! (This girl has got out of hand!)”

Little did they know, that there’s more to that ‘bigdi hui ladki’. That she is now her own boss and her own leader and is living enough to conquer her dreams.

I do not listen now, and I certainly do not care about what the world has to say. For there are already a lot of women listening to the world.

My dreams pushed me to the edge and woke me up. My words called upon me and I was told that it’s high time that we escape the pages of your diary and come out on the face of the world.

The fact that my heart leads me, makes me get called a  “bigdi hui ladki”.

I am ‘bigdi hui’ because I dared and guess what, I’m proud to be one.