Too often in life, we go through these phases where we feel empty, unloved and unworthy. We create a mountain of these negative emotions within us and we end up frustrated with ourselves and with our life.
I have seen young women getting into wrong relationships because they want to feel loved they desire to feel special and of course there isn’t anything wrong with that, after all, we all want to feel loved and special but do we really need another person to make us believe that we are beautiful, worthy of love and that we are special in our own ways? See, the problem here is not if the other recognizes us for our qualities but it is when that other doesn’t really exist in the moment and that’s when we feel empty. We need to realize that true strength lies in being your own person in appreciating yourself when there’s no one around to appreciate you. Loving yourself when there’s no one around to say I love you to you. Calling yourself beautiful when people judge your looks, taking care of yourself because you are your own responsibility, not any man’s. Making yourself feel special when your Mr. Right isn’t around to do so.
I have seen my friends looking for validation from others but what goes wrong here is that we start looking at the world from their perspective and not our own when we seek their approval.
I remember a friend from high school who used to practice self-love, she looked into the mirror, smiled, and said “ I love you beautiful”, to herself. These words were so simple to utter but so impactful. I am too often criticized for being full of myself, but what really is that? It’s the ability to love yourself, to honor yourself because only when you love yourself completely will you be able to love others as Oprah Winfrey says that when the glass is full only then will it be overflowing.
We need to remind ourselves that our existence matters, it counts.
Loving yourself doesn’t come naturally, it requires mindful practice to where you don’t allow the toxic thoughts to enter your mind. It requires you to do something for yourself from calling yourself beautiful to doing what makes you happy just to be able to remind yourself that you are loved and special.
When the toxic thoughts enter your mind, you have got to shake them off.
Those toxic thoughts will probably tell you “oh but your nose is too fat, your complexion isn’t good, you aren’t so talented, settle down for less because you don’t deserve more” but you have to silence these thoughts and listen to your own inner voice which calls you beautiful, because you are.
To all the women out there I have only one thing to say, you don’t need a prince charming to be called beautiful, to feel special because you are your own person!
There is beauty hidden within each one of us, all it demands is that we recognize it, that we ourselves appreciate it and not wait for any special someone or prince charming to do the needful. Love yourself beautiful, because you are worth it!
-This post was first published on Huffington Post.