To the man, she loves now,
The one who dazzles – have you seen that one?
Upon him look !
A sleepless stream in search of him I run,
A restless brook.
In far off woods, a lonely pine I stood
Till he appeared,
My woodcutter, and came to cut the wood.
His fire I feared,
Yet though he burn my logs, behold, I shine
My ashes wine !
– Habba Khatoon
If you’re reading this letter, you’ve already met me. I’m one of her best friends. I know you’re lucky enough to have her, I’m sure she is too.You may need to learn a few things about her though, some of which, you may already know.So let me tell you, that it’s in her denial where you’ll find the hidden truths. The secrets lie there, where she denies the most.
Before I tell you things about her, I will love to tell you what I miss the most. I didn’t know how to take care of her, I always forget to pick her up when I’m supposed to, I always fail to be on time when we meet up, I didn’t know how to treat her right, I always look at girls passing by. I always become impatient when she’s being stubborn, I always ignore her and her stupid rants. I didn’t know how to love her right, I always forget to text her back, I always ignore her when she’s feeling blue, I always forget when her birthday was or the last time I took her out on a date. I can’t even remember the last time I looked deep into her eyes, I forgot they were the same color as the caramel I used to love, I forgot how her hair always smelled like strawberries and how much I loved burying my face in them or how her soft skin feels like, I forgot how much her smile can make me smile and her laugh, oh God, her laugh they sound like the birds singing after a hurricane.
It’s when she says more than often, that it doesn’t bother her, that you know it bothers her way too much. Don’t ask her too many questions. Just be there. And when she laughs and you feel it’s the most beautiful sound in the world, is when you know it’s a genuine laugh. You will feel the urge to squeeze her cheeks then. Do that. She’ll then respond by hugging you, and trust me, you want her hugs.
When she looks at something for too long, and longingly, a wall, a chair, or at you, is when she’s thinking to herself and gathering up enough courage to tell you something. Don’t push her. Let her take her time.You can annoy her all you want. She may get mad. No, she will get mad. She will walk away in anger. But don’t worry, she’s not even thinking about leaving you. Let her take her time. She’ll be back soon. She knows you need him. She needs you too.
Sometimes, on an ordinary day, she’ll go out of her way, just to make you feel special. And other times, she may not even remember your birthday. Yes, she’s like that. Unpredictable. Remind her though. To others, you may sound pathetic. But she’ll actually appreciate you for this. Don’t blame her when she forgets. Remind her, and then be ready to witness your day turn into something magical.
When she’s engrossed in a book, or a show, join her if you want. She’ll gladly make you a part of her fantasy land. But if you’re not into it, please don’t disturb her.Let her be. She loves that time. Her mind needs some wandering too.And when you become parents, trust me you’ll have to be the strict one. She’ll spoil your baby and you may want to keep a check on them both. Also, your baby will love her more, but you’ll see why.
Ask her often how she’s doing. Her past hasn’t been too nice to her, and nobody asked her then. If she gets tired of being strong, please let her be the weak one.Let her be vulnerable, not just because she needs it, but because she loves you enough to be so. For a while, be strong enough for the both of you.
Lastly, I don’t need to ask you to do this, but please, love her. Love her like you didn’t even know what love was, until she happened to you. Trust her like a child, who trusts his father with his first bicycle ride. Always hold her close. closer. Yes. That’s the way to love her.
Before making this latter to its end, I forget, in the beginning, to tell you something more I have done with her, yes, I feel sorry but I just want to let you know that, I never noticed her freckles look like constellations and how much they light up her face, I never looked at her the way you do and I really hope that you’re different from me. I never realized what I had. I failed her. I failed myself. I treated her like she’s nothing. I broke her. So you treat her right. Hold her tight when she’s in pain. Hold her hand when she’s scared. Sing for her. Buy her flowers. Do all the things I never got to do, because that is what she deserves. She deserves twice the man that I could ever be, Don’t make yourself regret losing her, because in this lifetime you might only get one person to put up with your shit. I, for one, know how it feels. I lost that diamond. So, please take care of her.
The one who wishes to receive this letter.
Syed Tajamul Imran
In the hope of a ‘RICH and Prosperous’ life, from ‘paradise on earth Kashmir’, SYED TAJAMUL IMRAN who believes that the purpose of a business is to create a customer who creates customers, is a story teller, an MBA, working with Lenskart.com with the dream of breaking the status quo. He can be reached at [email protected]
Note:- The piece is based on the series of fiction writing and has nothing to do with personal life of author.