Me Too – So That My Children Don’t Share My Pain

6 and a dark hospital room
I could sense a finger in there
And his moanings
“Jaagte Raho” chanted the chowkidar
“Jaagte Raho,” I can still hear it. Feel it.

10. Kitchen. Home.
Learning how to prepare maggi,
“Come beta, I’ll show you
How to mix the masala.”
That hardness makes me feel dirty till date.

13 and at the market.
Laughing and enjoying
Strange hands groped me.
Those hands with a beaded bracelet,
They still haunt me…

“Bhaiya ek doodh ka packet dena.”
The hands carelessly brushed
The newly developed breasts.
The boy smirked.
Gave him money while
Fighting back tears…

19. Young and carefree.
“I love you. I’m not like others.”
The first kiss. The first love.
“Sshh it won’t hurt.” The first lie.
It did hurt. The gossips hurt.
The pictures and videos did too.

22. I love travelling.
Late night flights. My favourite.
Why was the co-passenger shaking?
Oh….in a plane? Right beside me?
Twice. No thrice. Lost the count.
I take morning flights now.

25 and very active on Facebook!
“Hey babe, you so hot.”
“Wanna fuck?”
“Wanna rip that skirt apart.”
I don’t check the
Filtered messages anymore.

But that’s enough.
Suffered enough.
Been quiet for long.
I’ll speak
I’ll share
I’ll make you ashamed
Of your mindset. So that
My sons and daughters,
Nieces and nephews
Will never ever have
My nightmares.

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