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Whether You’re 15 Or 45, Here Are 5 Things All Indian Parents Always Tell You To Do

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Parenting is an art that comes naturally in Indians. Clichés, stereotypes and a habit of intervention is found in every Indian parent irrespective of caste, creed, religion and region, and that’s why our parents are what constitutes of a ‘typical’ Indian parents. These characteristics become a source of annoyance, obstructions and compromises for the children at times.

“Where are you going?”, “When will you be back?”, “Where were you till now?” are some common questions of every Indian parent. Parents in India consider it a fundamental right to interfere and object to everything. This problem sometimes occurs because of a generation gap, since for a person in their 20’s, the parents would probably be from the 1960’s generation. Parents would always carry misconceptions or myths about how a younger generation sees life and wants to live it.

Even if a person turns 40, our parents would still be the ‘typical Indian parents’ worried (even if a little too much) about their child. They don’t care if their child is grown up and can take decisions on their own, they’d be there to watch out. This mentality can be found in all parents from all parts of India. For them, their child is still a child in diapers who knows nothing about the world and must be protected.

1. Aspiration Is Just A Word In The Dictionary  

Life is a race, and we are nothing more than Milkha Singh for our parents. So as soon as you are born, your career is decided by parents.

Aspirations are nothing more than a fancy word for Indian parents. So if you decide to be a writer or a singer instead of becoming an engineer or a CA, you are left with two options – forget what you want and follow what your parents have planned or choose what you love and ready to hear taunts the entire life.

The situation can be even worse if a child of your mausi (aunt), bua (aunt) or that distant relative has achieved good marks in engineering or medical. If their starting package is even ₹50,000 more than yours, you are going to live a life of trait for a few years at least.

“Log kya kahenge, kitna hi kama lega/legi in sab se (What will people say. It doesn’t matter how much you’ll earn. What will society think?)”, is the ultimate fear that is killing a singer, a writer, a poet, a dancer every day, because society doesn’t consider these professions big enough. And this is the same reason why we have a plethora of engineers, doctors, and MBAs struggling to find jobs.

Can our parents finally come out of this mentality that engineering, or MBBS or CA or MBA or any other technical education is the sole criteria for earning name, fame and money?

2. Marriage Is The Ultimate Objective

You are committing sin if you aren’t married after you cross 25 – 26 years of age – at least it is sin in the eyes of every aunt, and that relative who brings you proposals as if they get a referral bonus for referring a marriage proposal to your family

You study well – because you want to get married, you find a good job – because you need dowry in marriage, you save for future – to spend on kids, you live life just because you want to get married.

Emotional melodrama has attacked everybody who thought even once of not getting married. Mothers skipping their lunch/dinners, fathers sitting quietly for few days, ‘thinking’ – and you are trapped now. Either say yes to marriage else society will tag you as the most useless creature who doesn’t care about their hungry mother and tensed father!

3. Cellphones Are Bots In Disguise Controlling Your Every Move

Your habits, behaviour, even your inspiration system is also accessed by how society thinks – not how ultimate well-wishers want to see. Society decides what we’ll wear, how we’ll talk, and what we’ll say. It doesn’t happen because we keep quiet – this happens because our parents think society is always right. Mrs Sharma who lives 50 houses away from our house knows about our room and sleeping habits better than our mom who lives merely 10 inches from our room.

Sleeping till late in the morning isn’t a bad habit for Indian mothers because of science, it is a bad habit because all other children residing in the street wake up at 7 AM. It doesn’t matter if all others take the same amount of sleep during the day, but what matters is their waking time in the morning.

Mobiles are the ultimate cause of every wrong thing that you do, even if you didn’t touch the mobile during that entire doing. You rebel – because you use mobile, you sneeze because you use mobile, basically, everything you do is because of that mobile. You live because you didn’t use mobile, you’ll die – because you used mobile!

4. Phone And Relationships Have A Direct Correlation 

If you don’t talk on the phone in front of your parents, the logic is simple – you are in love and your partner is going to destroy your life now. The moment a WhatsApp message arrives – even before you open the phone lock to see the message, your mother is convinced that your boyfriend/girlfriend has messaged you.

If you are not going to functions or not going outside with parents, you have no right to put on makeup or excessive perfume – else you are just going on a date and this is all to impress your date

5. A Good Scolding Can Be Given Irrespective Of Who You Are With

Did you just think that your mom isn’t going to taunt you if you are talking something important? You are wrong – moms don’t see who you are talking to, if they decide to scold or taunt you, you’ll not be spared at any cost – better to tell your friends or acquaintances in advance about this. Don’t worry! Nobody will mind – for everyone has parents (Indian Parents)!

I love this habit of Indian parents that they do all these things irrespective of the gender of the child. Girl or boy – everyone receives the same interference and taunts from parents at every age in every phase. All are equal and similar – at least in eyes of Indian parents.

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Now as an MH Fellow with YKA, she’s expanding her impressive scope of work further by launching a campaign to facilitate the process of ensuring better menstrual health and SRH services for women residing in correctional homes in West Bengal. The campaign will entail an independent study to take stalk of the present conditions of MHM in correctional homes across the state and use its findings to build public support and political will to take the necessary action.

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The long-term aim of the campaign is to develop an open culture where menstruation is not treated as a taboo. The campaign also seeks to hold the schools accountable for their responsibilities as an important component in the implementation of MHM policies by making adequate sanitation infrastructure and knowledge of MHM available in school premises.

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Harshita is a psychologist and works to support people with mental health issues, particularly adolescents who are survivors of violence. Associated with the Azadi Foundation in UP, Harshita became an MHM Fellow with YKA, with the aim of promoting better menstrual health.

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A student from Delhi School of Social work, Vineet is a part of Project Sakhi Saheli, an initiative by the students of Delhi school of Social Work to create awareness on Menstrual Health and combat Period Poverty. Along with MHM Action Fellow Sabna, Vineet launched Menstratalk, a campaign that aims to put an end to period poverty and smash menstrual taboos in society.

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As a Youth Ki Awaaz Menstrual Health Fellow, Nitisha has started Let’s Talk Period, a campaign to mobilise young people to switch to sustainable period products. She says, “80 lakh women in Delhi use non-biodegradable sanitary products, generate 3000 tonnes of menstrual waste, that takes 500-800 years to decompose; which in turn contributes to the health issues of all menstruators, increased burden of waste management on the city and harmful living environment for all citizens.

Let’s Talk Period aims to change this by

Find out more about her campaign here.

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