He couldn’t bear the pain. It was tearing him apart. He couldn’t think of anything except her for the moment. She was all over his mind. He was infested by her thoughts. He was drowning in her memories but he couldn’t tell whether he wanted to breath again or drown and never be saved. She was spreading like venom killing him cell by cell. He had tried to end everything and stop this agony but he wants this pain as much as he wants her back. He knew he had lost her this torment is the remanants of her presence. This pain is the antidote for the poison that she is, this could cure him or kill him but this was his momentary need. This is the only way he could keep her alive in him as he is alive till he can remember her. She had left him with a life of like a parasite that feeds and thrive off her memories that he has.