Why Does Society Get To Decide Where Our Honour Lies?

Posted by Isha Rai in Society, Specials
December 12, 2017

Has the fear of society impacted our life so much, that we’ve forgotten who we truly are?

Questions like “what people will think?”, “what will they say?” and so on has deeply affected the individual in such a way, that they forget about what they actually want in life and what gives them real happiness.

I remember an incident that occurred a few years ago when I had completed my post-graduation, and had started working. One of my colleagues was in love with a boy who did not belong to the same caste as hers. She told her parents that she wanted to marry him. Before her parents could react, or suggest her something, her younger brother who was just 19 years old, said that it is not possible as no one in their family has had a love marriage. He said that it would affect their reputation in society, and what people would think of them.

I was really shocked to hear that. How can a 19-year-old boy think of that? Was he really speaking his mind or was he just saying things that he saw in his family and in friend circles, or his neighborhood?

We talk about the development of our country and equality among our people, and so on. But when it comes to society, we really forget about our happiness. I really don’t understand how our country will develop if  we continue to kill children in the name of honour or stop children from leading the life they want.

Our life should be very simple – if we love someone and want to marry them, then we should. And, we must be able to seek blessings from our elders, without it being so complicated.

In a situation like the one above, the couple may elope to get married, but then, they may still not be safe from honour killing. But if they don’t marry the person they love and marry a person of their parents’ choice, then they may not be happy. And if they’re not happy, then society would blame them for an unsuccessful marriage.

I really don’t understand why people give society so much importance by risking their own happiness. We need to think wisely, because our little support can go a long way and has the potential to save lives. It’s time we enhance our thinking for the betterment and development of the individual and the society, as a whole.