While having a discussion with my parents, I referred to the whole Aziz Ansari incident, which was published on Babe by an anonymous writer under the alias ‘Grace’.
My dad said, “Your generation is not too serious about relationships. It’s all about casual dating and hookups. During our time, love was pure.”
I know he has every right to say that, for the only woman in his life was my mom. As a side note, sometimes I wish I too was born during those times. I’m living in a time when hookup culture is rising but there used to be a time when people took dating seriously. There is a huge difference between the approach of our parents’ generation and how we approach dating today.
I am not saying that having a good time without any strings is a bad thing. But I have to admit that I would appreciate getting concrete signs that someone is into me without having to decrypt their verbal and non-verbal cues in order to understand what they want.
Due to the rise of dating applications and enormous social media websites, one can easily stalk someone on social media and discover their interests, social life and friends. After getting to know so much simply by glancing at their profiles, they would then decide to go on a date. But I don’t think it should be this way. If we already know the person, we won’t have the patience for long conversations through which we could get to know them.
I think we should learn to take things slowly, where we wait to find out what the other person expects. Some have no problem in having sex on the first date and others don’t. If we prefer to wait and take things slowly, then the type of incident which happened with Aziz Ansari would not happen.
In modern dating, there are too many mind games being played. Why is it like this? When was the last time any of us said to someone, “I really like you and I want to get to know you better.” Wouldn’t this be great? It’s simple and effective.
I think that it’s time we reconsider changing our dating habits to avoid feeling terrible about our sexual experiences.