How Long Do Us Introverts Have To Pretend To Be What We’re Not?

Posted by Rajdeep Gurung in Society
February 23, 2018

We all know about the two extreme ends of gender spectrum. In the same way our personality also has such a spectrum at the extreme ends of which are extroverts and introverts. Understanding this is very important for every individual so that none of us are lost and led to believing that ‘extrovert’ is the correct place to be in the spectrum.

Extroverts are those people who are energized and active around stimulation – stimulation here includes not only social, but also other kinds like sound, movement, etc. Therefore they thrive well in any social situation.

Whereas introverts are highly sensitive to stimulation which leads them to want to run away from certain social situations after a while. They need to be alone in order to gain their drained energy after socializing.

This is the fact. Every individual is either an extrovert or an introvert, or falls somewhere between the two in the spectrum. I came across these terms when I was around 20 years old and have only recently (23 now) completely accepted and embraced myself as an introvert. And there is nothing wrong with that at all. The way one comes to term with their gender, the same way they should understand their personality. I think they should be able to do this at early age and not later on in life like me when I had already made decisions that I can’t go back from. For this, education and awareness is a must.

The system is such that extroverts are seen as the ideal personality type and introverts as somewhat a stigma. Schools teaches their children to be outgoing and to aim to be all rounders. Individual identity is not encouraged, they want everyone to be an all rounder and be out going. Society wants every man to be bold, and never shy, always ready to tackle anything. Industries wants their leaders to have the same qualities. All the qualities that describe an extrovert. Then what about the introverts? What about half of the population that are the introverts? Are we to live our life pretending to be someone we are not?

A student can be introvert and still excel in all the curriculum and academics. They may not be the most popular kid or the prefect of the school, but they may still be a good athlete, or good in academics. A man need not be bold and alpha to be a man. He may be compassionate, chivalrous and have good cooking skills and still be a man. I believe a company led by an introvert with qualities like good listening skills and empathy can still thrive in the market.

Mahatma Gandhi, once said “In a gentle way, you can shake the world.”

We are often the misunderstood group. We do not hate people. We are not anti-social. We are not depressed or ’emo’. We’re just quiet but we observe, a lot. We tend to express our thoughts and feelings more through writing than speaking them outloud. We think a lot before speaking. We prefer quiet and alone time over socializing. We tend to have a smaller group of friends. Having these qualities is not harming me or anyone.When your’re asking an introvert to “speak up more”, or “be more lively” – you being in your own comfort zone are asking them to come out of their comfort zone.

Extroverted qualities are not the only qualities that can lead to success. Imagine a world filled with extroverts. Would that be a place you’d want to live in? Introversion is a quality that should not be looked down upon, but rather encouraged so that the world can listen to our point of view and ideas too. We need a world that is the mixture of both where introverts and extroverts can complement each other and produce better results.