Dear Parents, It Is Okay To Let Your Children Make Mistakes

Posted by arnold in Society
April 14, 2018

Today, most of us have over-protective parents. I don’t mean to offend anyone. I know a guy who just has restrictions regarding everything. Yes, of course, he has all the facilities needed and gets all he wants, but my point is he has absolutely no experience of what the outside world is like. Undoubtedly, that person is simply confined to the four walls of his room. This is wrong. His parents are spoiling him rather than protecting him because he never gets to learn from experiences.

People learn only when they fall down from the cycle while on their way to a friend’s house, only when they learn to figure out the difference between good and bad, and only when they are allowed to make mistakes. Only then can they grow into a completely developed person. Therefore, they must be allowed to make mistakes; we must be allowed to make mistakes since life is all about second chances. I bet on it. Mistakes give wounds, cuts and pain – but they also teach us not to make the same mistake again. Yes, I’m completely aware of the dangers of today’s society (kidnapping, drug addiction, etc) – yet, we must be given a chance to make mistakes. Restricting a teen without any reason will only build frustration inside them, eventually leading to depression.

When people are teenagers, they like doing what they see other people of their age do. And when someone restricts these actions without a solid reason, teens start building small pockets of frustration inside their brain. Norepinephrine is secreted by the adrenal medulla and is related to alertness. In fact, this is the chemical that is actually related to the so-called “adrenaline rush” that can be common in cases of intense anger, which can sometimes lead to acts of aggression in certain situations. In those moments, they are questioning only one thing – “Why only me?” or “Why am I the only one not allowed to do it when others are doing it?” And whenever someone tries to argue this point, we hear only one thing from the parents: “Shut up, we know better than you!”

But I’d like to say to such parents that yes, obviously you are our elders and you know better than us – but for god’s sake, allow us to learn by ourselves. Help us to be practical. We do not have practicals at schools or colleges, but at least allow us to do it in real life. Meeting friends must not be a restriction (unless they are devils). Playing with friends must not be a restriction. Remember – teenagers enjoy the company of other teenagers. Making mistakes must not be a restriction. Taking risk must not be a restriction. This calls for a change in the society, and a change in the mindset of the people.

Here’s a poem from the book “Personality Development” by Dr. Rituporna Raj:

To live is to risk dying.
To believe is to risk despair.
To try is to risk failure.
To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach for another is to risk involvement.
To expose your feeling is to risk exposing your true self.
To place your ideas, your dreams, before a crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
But risks must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing,
The people who risk nothing, do nothing, have nothing, are nothing.
They may avoid sufferings and sorrow, but they cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love and live.

Therefore, chained by their attitudes, they are slaves who have forfeited their freedom. You might be thinking all this is good to read, but is it possible in real life? Well, yes, because everyone whom you admire or see on TV have made mistakes (maybe a hundred times) before finally achieving success. It’s my humble request to parents to allow their children to make mistakes, to mingle with different kinds of people of their age, to allow them to socialise with people of their age – and most importantly, please do not force your opinions on them.

If any parent is reading this and feels offended, please feel free to contact me here.