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Why I Am Sometimes Scared At The Thought Of Getting Married

I have been brought up as an independent girl, given the choice and liberty to take decisions on my own. Maybe for some people, they would call it pampering or spoiling the daughters. Though in most families, daughters are usually cared for but the situation varies for the daughters-in-law in the same families.

One of my male friends shared his thoughts that girls and women should be pampered in different capacities such as daughters, nieces, girlfriends, sisters, wives, mothers and so on.

Am I wrong when I get scared that things would change a lot after I get married? Are my parents and family wrong in treating me special because we are not sure of what family situation I would later find myself in? Whether the prospective family would be wrong if they are expecting their daughter-in-law to change her mannerisms as it has been a traditional norm?

I too dream of a life-partner who is like my best friends (male ones) whom I have seen respectful and sensitive towards their partners. A girl is bound to leave her home in which she has lived all her childhood, became a teen and grown up as an adult. She expects little time, some affection and understanding from her new family. I do not think that her expectations are wrong or unjustified.

I do not think that I am being unfair in raising the bar of expectations seeing two of my friends as supportive life-partners. I tell both of them that they have done wrong being so extraordinary as men and as a result making me expect a person in my life of their standards.

I feel the idea of marriage should not scare a girl or the boy. But in reality, even the guy and his family get scared these days about marrying their son. The instances of breaking the family have become common. Even the guy feels scared that how he would balance between his wife and his family. This fear is not usually talked about.

I am just hoping to find a life-partner, who is like a best friend who is always there for me, in good times and in bad.

 

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