My Idea Of Love: Wanting Something More Than A Right Swipe

It’s futile to say that dating is not what it used to be due to a variety of reasons, most popular ones being lack of time and fear of commitment. As a result of the world becoming fast-paced and commitment-averse, online dating and hookups are becoming increasingly popular.

Dating apps such as Tinder and Bumble have made it increasingly convenient to find others for one night stand or casual relationship making the dating culture depend heavily on swiping. Some may argue that hookups and casual relationships are a good way to satisfy sexual urges, but what about something more?

While I think casual relationships are fine if you’re into that sort of thing, I’m someone who would rather have something a bit more substantial than a fling which will mean nothing by the end of the day. I prefer meeting and getting to know someone face to face rather than ‘swiping right’ for someone on Tinder.

Swiping right on dating apps: a sign of the times. (Photo: Wikipedia)

The idea of joining Tinder first came to me in my third year of college when one of my batch mates was in a serious relationship with a match and plenty of others were on there hoping to get some action. I joined plainly due to the sheer ridiculousness of it; there were zero expectations and a lot of questions about my sanity.

My vision for the ‘experiment’ (if you can call it that) was clear – just some fun online chat, no dates (there were exceptions) and definitely no casual sex. The initial few weeks were fun, you swipe right, hopefully, the other person will do the same, you’ll match – end of story. I was lucky enough to match with a few genuinely nice guys who I ended up forming a short term online friendship with, but many of the profiles I came across were very straightforward about wanting nothing more than sex.

There were guys who would immediately ask me out on a date without any prior conversation. However, after a few weeks I realised, Tinder gets really boring, really soon, if you are not on it for hookups.

For me, dating apps are just plain fun; if you are looking for a fling you might get lucky; if you are looking for something more meaningful, it’s definitely not for you. I would still suggest you use them if you want a long term relationship only because the sheer number of suitors and their profiles (bios and pictures) are enough to get you through a drab day; just don’t expect any intellectual stimulation and join with low expectations.

Well, this was my Tinder journey of trying to find a long term relationship. It turned out to be exactly what I thought it was – an app helpful for those who only want the ‘honeymoon phase’ and not the real complications that come with a romantic relationship.

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