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This Father’s Day, I’m Caught Between Patriarchy And Compassion

Dear Father,

At the outset, greetings!

Actually, I wanted to address you with a small ‘f’ as I thought it would be more affectionate and effective. Especially, after seeing your hard work and effort you put in to raise us and gave us the support to stand up on our legs. Many ‘fathers’ these days are showing deep concern about their children and trying to help them cope up in this competitive and busy world.

Image used for representation purposes only.

When I was told that someone like Aristotle said “Child is the father of man”, I really felt proud as fathers have been given the highest honour in history by writers and philosophers.

But sorry, the word ‘father’ has almost become synonymous with domination, patriarchy, assaults, rapes, harassment and insults. Many fathers are intent on making their children grow up on their own terms, marry the person of their choice and even going to the extent of killing their daughters in the name of honour killings. Still, there are fathers who do not like their daughters to study and pursue higher education. They detest their daughters having independent thoughts and yearn for freedom. I feel angry when I hear of the fathers who harass their wives, mothers and sisters and impose their ‘will’ over them.

Hence, fathers have been associated with more evil than good. The patriarchal society has exploited women and children, especially daughters.  Father, I would like to see a society where fathers are associated with ‘fatherly’ compassion rather than hate and despise. Only true ‘father’s day’ would be more meaningful justifiable.

I would be happy if all the ‘evil’ associated with ‘father’ one day becomes a thing of past and fathers are remembered with fondness and reverence. Meanwhile, I wish you happiness and I also expect you to work for a more equitable society where there is no space for exploitation and domination.

Yours loving,

Your child.

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