चुपचाप बैठे हुए ख़ाब हैं
बेचैन हैं, थोड़े बेताब हैं
अंदर कहीं जो भी सैलाब है
जाते करो, बातें करो !
Humming this tune while rummaging my clothes drawer, just another day in quarantine, I came across some pictures and that too like tangible,tactile, visible pictures…
Pictures from My School Years: Though it hasn’t been long since I left , it felt as if I have been long away and distant from all these blissful and euphoric moments. Those pictures were arranged in random order but each of them speaking VOLUMES! Hard to resist laughable moments, even more unforgettable tear eyed memories, some totally maddening behaviors and Drive – you- to-the -edge clumsy stuffs with those morons (Read: friends)- all just lay there bare and waiting to be relived!
And just then from somewhere this striking realization dawns upon me that boot is on the other foot. The ‘casualties’ on this road to adulthood is difficult to ascertain unless one is into it. The growth is critical as well as testing. You see,learn,fall,grow,lose,win,jeopardize but in the end you become ‘YOU’. Yeah! i get it: seems difficult for me to analyse this much .. but it was stark and quite a precedent realization.
While childhood was tranquilized, you could do things at your own pace and that sense of being unhurried was actually peaceful. Hurrying is so deeply embedded in us at adult time to such an extent that we often don’t listen even when we are given permission to slow down. We don’t believe that we can. We have that constant FOMO of life. If you aren’t running around, something is wrong with you!!!
While earlier that “Atti batti 100 saal ki katti” wouldn’t last more than 10-15 minutes, its been months since some of us patched up since our last arguments.
Winning and losing was just a way to find even better ways to learn. Now its just winning and just winning at all costs- maybe even our own soul. Talking, back in good ‘ol days was unfiltered and inquisitive. Nowadays its forged and counterfeited, even the emotions! Means can you guess that??? Certain number of followers, likes, retweets, seeking approval from others for your actions, impressing and flaunting others describes your validation !!!! Ridiculous is what i say it is!
Insecurities,Jealously,Trepidation,Worries,annoyance,disappointments,fears,DISTRACTIONS…… on and on….
PHEW!! When did just life became so complex ????? Oh! yes since i realized that like a caterpillar in its cocoon I have been evolving myself.
The Bottom line I realized about the whole thing is – Its about lemons and tarts but most importantly , its about Lemon tarts 🙂
And with that stark realization i began humming again –
आओ ज़रा हँसने-रोने सुनें
पल सारे दीवारें-कोने सुनें
एक बेवजह, बेतुकी सी कहानी में
अपने भी किरदार होने सुनें!