I don’t know how many people will believe but I have been mentally humiliated by my mother and her side of relatives for years. Right from my career choices to the city I chose to work in, from my college subject to the friends I make, from the places I visit to the words I utter or the people who come to visit me, everything should be according to them. It’s kind of a ‘mafia girl’ I have been forced to abide by for years after losing my father.
If I opposed their wrongful behavior, they would team up against me, shout at me, let me down by intimidating me and compare me with others, spreading rumors about me and attacking me with derogatory personal questions eventually would break me from inside. I am a 31-year-old woman. I don’t understand what satisfaction they get by imposing their wrongful behavior on me.
Whenever I try to start something positive in my life, they’re there to ruin everything with their negative, spiteful words and absurd questions. I had locked myself up in a room for years to save myself from their humiliation, until I got a job in some other city and started having a life and getting some fresh air. It was my destiny that Covid-19 happened, and the lockdown got implemented, and my employer stopped giving work from home.
It was not convenient for me to travel during the outbreak of Covid-19 to my workplace using public transport every day. So, I had to leave the job and come back to my city sometimes. I came back because of one more reason: I had to appear for an exam, which I didn’t want to miss. So, amidst the uncertainty of the extension of lockdown and the quarantine rules, I decided to stay a few months at home and look for something I could do from my city for the time.
I often chose to reach out to people, but when one’s mother is involved in humiliation, it gets difficult to let that come out in public. I hope I accumulate the strength to fight the wrong in the coming days and find myself some peace by protesting against their forceful behavior open in public one day. I hope I become able to live with dignity and stop their year-old humiliation in the coming days.