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Do You Struggle To Have An Effective Conversation With People? Here Are 7 Tips

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Speaking well is the core of any communication. However, many people are not good at striking conversations. A failure of having effective conversations can damage your relationships, career opportunities and personal growth. To be a good friend, a great partner, a leader and an effective manager, you need to be able to speak well. Fortunately, there are some very simple tips you can use to get started in a conversation

1. Choose Short Chats

Most people want to be liked by others. To not violate the existing norms, they sometimes behave as if they are stepping on eggshells (very carefully). What they forget is that man is a social being whose not-so-pleasant conversations can also be beneficial to his mental health. Studies show that even minimal social interactions (for example, chatting with a stranger on the train) can increase a person’s mood.

2. Consider Personality Differences To Speak Well

In terms of the impact of personality traits on conversation management, the reason for personality differences is less relevant than is often thought. Both extroverts and introverts are social beings. Introverts are more concerned with how conversations go than extroverts. But these differences disappear when people report the benefits of a conversation. In addition to introversion, this research examined other personality differences, such as self-esteem, which did not have a significant effect.

Image credit: Wikimedia Commons

There are two sides to every conversation, and both play a major role together in advancing a satisfying dialogue. As a speaker as well as a listener, it is essential to have the necessary communication skills. Every aspect of success in your life depends on your conversations and good speech.

3. Value The Presence Of Those Around You

Having a good friend who can have an energetic conversation is exciting for most people. Someone who counts the moments till meeting them. The secret is that they are attractive in one thing. Skills in exciting to others. They know how to keep others entertained by the way they talk.  This is not fake excitement. They are really interested in energetic dialogue and are involved in discussions. People around them feel that they are given deep importance by them. This is an important point. If the other person feels that you really value them, you have already increased your chance of a good conversation to 95%.

4. Ask Questions To Speak Well

Leave the conversation to yourself, not by talking about yourself, but by asking about other people’s issues. Asking a question and then eagerly listening to the other’s answer is a sign that you really care about them. Your body language can be your second language for speaking well and being a good listener. In a good conversation, the person who asks the most questions wins.

5. It Is Not Necessary To Answer All The Questions

The purpose of asking questions is not to add your personal answers to all of them. Sometimes, giving quick answers can end the conversation earlier than expected. The silence created is usually unpleasant and difficult to manage for both parties. Most people offer many solutions to help the other party. After the question is posed, they quickly deal with the solutions; not because the listener really needs help, but because they feel they are smart. They insist on passing on their incredible knowledge to the other side.

6. Do Not Be Afraid Of Your Weaknesses To Speak Well

When you really share your vulnerabilities, you allow the other person to be more honest about themselves. You provide a secure space for real conversation. Both of you can relieve the stress of your challenges by talking. Be confident enough to be able to share your insecure margins because you know you can handle them properly

7. Have A Sufficient And Real Presence

We live in an age of distraction. We easily get away from the main safe route with environmental stimuli and data. Think about how these external stimuli or internal worries can distance you from the person you are sitting in front of you. When entering into a conversation, force yourself to pay full attention to it. One of the easiest ways to do this is to turn off your phone first. Checking your phone has become a kind of nervous tic of people.

Last Word

Try a little to be warm and normal. Studies show that the best way to go about this is to make a strategic impact no matter how you are.  From the beginning, start the conversation with a few well-practised sentences about the issues of the day. Explaining these issues will make it easier for those around you to understand you. It eventually becomes a structure in which the other person forms their own perception of how to communicate with you.

Encourage people to talk about themselves. For people who have difficulty talking, always ask this one thing: what should I talk about? The conversation is made easier by asking questions. Do not worry about being noticed. Expecting rejection leads to a more defensive tone and colder behaviour than others. This in turn can lead to real rejection.

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An ambassador and trained facilitator under Eco Femme (a social enterprise working towards menstrual health in south India), Sanjina is also an active member of the MHM Collective- India and Menstrual Health Alliance- India. She has conducted Menstrual Health sessions in multiple government schools adopted by Rotary District 3240 as part of their WinS project in rural Bengal. She has also delivered training of trainers on SRHR, gender, sexuality and Menstruation for Tomorrow’s Foundation, Vikramshila Education Resource Society, Nirdhan trust and Micro Finance, Tollygunj Women In Need, Paint It Red in Kolkata.

Now as an MH Fellow with YKA, she’s expanding her impressive scope of work further by launching a campaign to facilitate the process of ensuring better menstrual health and SRH services for women residing in correctional homes in West Bengal. The campaign will entail an independent study to take stalk of the present conditions of MHM in correctional homes across the state and use its findings to build public support and political will to take the necessary action.

Saurabh has been associated with YKA as a user and has consistently been writing on the issue MHM and its intersectionality with other issues in the society. Now as an MHM Fellow with YKA, he’s launched the Right to Period campaign, which aims to ensure proper execution of MHM guidelines in Delhi’s schools.

The long-term aim of the campaign is to develop an open culture where menstruation is not treated as a taboo. The campaign also seeks to hold the schools accountable for their responsibilities as an important component in the implementation of MHM policies by making adequate sanitation infrastructure and knowledge of MHM available in school premises.

Read more about his campaign.

Harshita is a psychologist and works to support people with mental health issues, particularly adolescents who are survivors of violence. Associated with the Azadi Foundation in UP, Harshita became an MHM Fellow with YKA, with the aim of promoting better menstrual health.

Her campaign #MeriMarzi aims to promote menstrual health and wellness, hygiene and facilities for female sex workers in UP. She says, “Knowledge about natural body processes is a very basic human right. And for individuals whose occupation is providing sexual services, it becomes even more important.”

Meri Marzi aims to ensure sensitised, non-discriminatory health workers for the needs of female sex workers in the Suraksha Clinics under the UPSACS (Uttar Pradesh State AIDS Control Society) program by creating more dialogues and garnering public support for the cause of sex workers’ menstrual rights. The campaign will also ensure interventions with sex workers to clear misconceptions around overall hygiene management to ensure that results flow both ways.

Read more about her campaign.

MH Fellow Sabna comes with significant experience working with a range of development issues. A co-founder of Project Sakhi Saheli, which aims to combat period poverty and break menstrual taboos, Sabna has, in the past, worked on the issue of menstruation in urban slums of Delhi with women and adolescent girls. She and her team also released MenstraBook, with menstrastories and organised Menstra Tlk in the Delhi School of Social Work to create more conversations on menstruation.

With YKA MHM Fellow Vineet, Sabna launched Menstratalk, a campaign that aims to put an end to period poverty and smash menstrual taboos in society. As a start, the campaign aims to begin conversations on menstrual health with five hundred adolescents and youth in Delhi through offline platforms, and through this community mobilise support to create Period Friendly Institutions out of educational institutes in the city.

Read more about her campaign. 

A student from Delhi School of Social work, Vineet is a part of Project Sakhi Saheli, an initiative by the students of Delhi school of Social Work to create awareness on Menstrual Health and combat Period Poverty. Along with MHM Action Fellow Sabna, Vineet launched Menstratalk, a campaign that aims to put an end to period poverty and smash menstrual taboos in society.

As a start, the campaign aims to begin conversations on menstrual health with five hundred adolescents and youth in Delhi through offline platforms, and through this community mobilise support to create Period Friendly Institutions out of educational institutes in the city.

Find out more about the campaign here.

A native of Bhagalpur district – Bihar, Shalini Jha believes in equal rights for all genders and wants to work for a gender-equal and just society. In the past she’s had a year-long association as a community leader with Haiyya: Organise for Action’s Health Over Stigma campaign. She’s pursuing a Master’s in Literature with Ambedkar University, Delhi and as an MHM Fellow with YKA, recently launched ‘Project अल्हड़ (Alharh)’.

She says, “Bihar is ranked the lowest in India’s SDG Index 2019 for India. Hygienic and comfortable menstruation is a basic human right and sustainable development cannot be ensured if menstruators are deprived of their basic rights.” Project अल्हड़ (Alharh) aims to create a robust sensitised community in Bhagalpur to collectively spread awareness, break the taboo, debunk myths and initiate fearless conversations around menstruation. The campaign aims to reach at least 6000 adolescent girls from government and private schools in Baghalpur district in 2020.

Read more about the campaign here.

A psychologist and co-founder of a mental health NGO called Customize Cognition, Ritika forayed into the space of menstrual health and hygiene, sexual and reproductive healthcare and rights and gender equality as an MHM Fellow with YKA. She says, “The experience of working on MHM/SRHR and gender equality has been an enriching and eye-opening experience. I have learned what’s beneath the surface of the issue, be it awareness, lack of resources or disregard for trans men, who also menstruate.”

The Transmen-ses campaign aims to tackle the issue of silence and disregard for trans men’s menstruation needs, by mobilising gender sensitive health professionals and gender neutral restrooms in Lucknow.

Read more about the campaign here.

A Computer Science engineer by education, Nitisha started her career in the corporate sector, before realising she wanted to work in the development and social justice space. Since then, she has worked with Teach For India and Care India and is from the founding batch of Indian School of Development Management (ISDM), a one of its kind organisation creating leaders for the development sector through its experiential learning post graduate program.

As a Youth Ki Awaaz Menstrual Health Fellow, Nitisha has started Let’s Talk Period, a campaign to mobilise young people to switch to sustainable period products. She says, “80 lakh women in Delhi use non-biodegradable sanitary products, generate 3000 tonnes of menstrual waste, that takes 500-800 years to decompose; which in turn contributes to the health issues of all menstruators, increased burden of waste management on the city and harmful living environment for all citizens.

Let’s Talk Period aims to change this by

Find out more about her campaign here.

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A former Assistant Secretary with the Ministry of Women and Child Development in West Bengal for three months, Lakshmi Bhavya has been championing the cause of menstrual hygiene in her district. By associating herself with the Lalana Campaign, a holistic menstrual hygiene awareness campaign which is conducted by the Anahat NGO, Lakshmi has been slowly breaking taboos when it comes to periods and menstrual hygiene.

A Gender Rights Activist working with the tribal and marginalized communities in india, Srilekha is a PhD scholar working on understanding body and sexuality among tribal girls, to fill the gaps in research around indigenous women and their stories. Srilekha has worked extensively at the grassroots level with community based organisations, through several advocacy initiatives around Gender, Mental Health, Menstrual Hygiene and Sexual and Reproductive Health Rights (SRHR) for the indigenous in Jharkhand, over the last 6 years.

Srilekha has also contributed to sustainable livelihood projects and legal aid programs for survivors of sex trafficking. She has been conducting research based programs on maternal health, mental health, gender based violence, sex and sexuality. Her interest lies in conducting workshops for young people on life skills, feminism, gender and sexuality, trauma, resilience and interpersonal relationships.

A Guwahati-based college student pursuing her Masters in Tata Institute of Social Sciences, Bidisha started the #BleedwithDignity campaign on the technology platform Change.org, demanding that the Government of Assam install
biodegradable sanitary pad vending machines in all government schools across the state. Her petition on Change.org has already gathered support from over 90000 people and continues to grow.

Bidisha was selected in Change.org’s flagship program ‘She Creates Change’ having run successful online advocacy
campaigns, which were widely recognised. Through the #BleedwithDignity campaign; she organised and celebrated World Menstrual Hygiene Day, 2019 in Guwahati, Assam by hosting a wall mural by collaborating with local organisations. The initiative was widely covered by national and local media, and the mural was later inaugurated by the event’s chief guest Commissioner of Guwahati Municipal Corporation (GMC) Debeswar Malakar, IAS.

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