Books are the reflection of the world we live in. Isn’t it?
I am sure you extremely agree with what I just asked. Henceforth, I am reflecting on something I came across. Last night while reading a bedside story, my eyes were glued to this one. “What starts on the street should end on the street. Never carry it home-or to office-or to your niece’s birthday party.”
Though it is really ambiguous to reflect on this right away!
Let me explain this to you. Growing up how many times did you see your father getting angry at your mother for no reason. He returned from the office, business- irritated from the shit he had to deal with that day during the working hours.
Not just shouting, many of us saw them raising hands while mother was trying to clarify and even to console him.
My question to myself is why I never told him, he is wrong. Is there anyone else in the house he could get angry at for no reason? Or even outside the house?
Thing triggers me all the time since my childhood. Why Mumma?
And she nicely soaks all the humiliation for the sake of the family, “papa ko kaam ke such pareshani hai, Jane de!”
My mom, has also problems, mentally, or has to deal with things at a personal level. I saw everything, yet I found her balanced in carrying emotions. She never put it out on my dad.
Who sets this balance. And who taught my mom, “Jane de”?
These questions took summersaults in me, though the answers were there.
Last year, I watched “Thappad” by Tapsee Panu. The lady has my heart. I must say, being a married girl, watching this movie at home itself is a challenge, yet appreciating Tapsee for what she did, is yet a next-level thing. No matter how open-minded is your family, you’ll find all eyes on you, once you say- “she is right in filing the divorce just after one Thappad”. She further justifies that “the one slap you put on my cheek, could be on your Boses’s face. Amrita’s(Tapsee in the movie) husband had no answer as he knew that not possible in this patriarchal society”
Pyaar se samjha leti, itna bada step. I’ll see, the roots are rusted. Termites of old teachings have blocked the thinking we have these days. It just passing through the ages, without reflecting that is it even worth following?
Don’t carry the aggression to the wife, just because she is a wife.
That is why we need to see, that things you have to deal with must stay where they are. It is for everyone, “every gender.”
I tried this thing with me while getting married. My husband can love me, gets angry too, but for a reason, not because he had a bad day! I was progressive/ modern in the beginning but then I was just an independent wife.