Reshma eloped with Hassan when she was 19. It was an instant adrenaline decision full of romance, thrill and childlike humour.
Hassan was to turn 25 when he proposed to Reshma. They met at Reshma’s father’s mobile repair shop in Durgapur, West Bengal. Although, Reshma adored her father, nevertheless, she was fed up with his regular drinking habit. Hassan was unabridged, overflowing with vigour, hope and excitement. She did not think twice before saying yes to Hassan and seized the escapade.
They moved to Kolkata for better opportunities and existence. Hassan joined a nearby mechanic shop as an apprentice whereas Reshma joined a small school to teach the children. Their life appeared decent until a day when Hassan got an extremely high fever and was admitted in an emergency. Before this, he had fever bouts in Durgapur that had been ignored considering seasonal flu was spreading.
Reshma was in the hospital the whole night, waiting to hear about Hassan’s health update. She assumed it to be a kidney stone or liver issue. The doctor called Reshma and told her that Hassan was living with HIV. Her world turned upside down. In her village, this disease was considered taboo. People abstained from taking its name too. Reshma was tested and her result was positive as well. Reshma couldn’t sleep that night and prayed each second for Hassan’s betterment.
HIV is a virus that infects the immune system of an individual. It weakens the ability of the immune system to fight infection. AIDS is the final stage of HIV infection when the body can no more fight the infection.
A week in and out of the hospital, Hassan’s body finally gave up and he passed away. Bereaved and with no faith, Reshma returned to Durgapur for support. But when Reshmas parents realised her HIV status, they unashamedly refused to take her in and shut the door. The news spread like wildfire in the village and she was ousted from every abode, including her in-laws’, where she was assumed to be the source of infection.
As per the National AIDS Society of India, almost 2.5 million women in India are accounted to be living with HIV/AIDS. There is stigma and discrimination attached to this disease. Females are further subjected to social and financial discrimination. They are denied rights to the husband’s assets, property and are usually ostracised by society.
Reshma returned to Kolkata seeing no other option. She requested the school to let her teach but in vain. There were days when she would beg on the streets of Kolkata. She would eat scraps from the road or stroll through the lanes of big hotels to get leftovers from the hotel staff.
While struggling to make her ends meet, she got a contact in a nearby NGO (named Pariz) that worked for people with HIV and AIDS. They recruited her in the NGO and provided her government hospital links where she could receive medicines free of cost.
Reshma’s story is of several other women in India who live with HIV/AIDS. She represents the women population living with HIV that undergo innumerable health, psychological, and social challenges.
Today, Reshma works as a coordinator for the Pariz NGO. She meets other women living with HIV from the eastern part of India as a part of the awareness campaign. Reshma describes her life as a winter’s day – cold, harsh, dark but with a ray of sunshine (hope).