This article will help you understand and reduce stress. Stress is a term loosely applied to many complaints and often used without really understanding it. What is stress? Do you believe you are under extreme stress or suffering from stress? Would you like to relieve your stress levels?
Stress is the term used to describe a state where the demands being made on or by you are more significant than your capacity to deal with them. There is no clear medical definition of stress. However, we can describe it loosely to include the emotional, physiological, and psychological effects caused by a build-up of either internally or externally generated mental pressure.
It is important to note that stress can be created internally and externally. Unfortunately, we often overlook this aspect. Instead, we usually like to blame our work, other people, and the environment for our stress to live within our lives.
Yet, how much is actually within our control, and what should we do about it? How can we understand what stress is and how we can reduce or eliminate it in our lives if we even need to?
Is Stress Imaginary?
So many of us blame stress on many of our problems and believe people are genuinely made ill with stress. Do you think stress exists, or is it just a state of mind? Would you be surprised to know that there is no agreed medical definition of stress?
Stress is attributed to many uncomfortable and distressing problems associated with our lives, but stress itself is not a defined illness.
What Is Stress?
Many people may want to shout at this point that they have most definitely suffered from stress, and it has had a horrible effect on their lives. But, to use the term understood by society today, this’ stress’ can also be called worry, anxiety, social pressures. Or to use the more antiquated term ‘nerves’.
Whether you believe in stress as a specific illness or a generic condition, people struggle to deal with life and what it throws at them. This is the definition of stress that I will use in this article. If you feel your life is out of your control and impacting your health, or you would like to feel more in control, read on.
Whether stress exists as an illness or not- the interpretation of stress on the person can be made in the same way stress is attributed to a physical substance (i.e. as a ‘constraining or impelling force’), which helps understand what is going on with a person under stress.
The constraining or impelling force can be interpreted as the energy either expended by the person from internal stressors or applied against the person from external stressors. The vital thing to remember is that you are not happy with your life and somewhere you do not have the control or way of life that resonates with you.
However, life is not perfect. We have to accept that we cannot always have our way. Challenges and problems beset us from time to time. It is what makes us strong as human beings. We learn to adapt. Some stress builds our character. So, where does this ‘stress’ come from, and how should we deal with it?
What Are Stressors?
Stressors are the things believed to cause stress in our lives. Internal stressors are attributed to things that come from inside yourself. Puberty puts physical pressure on your body, as does illness and the expectations or standards you set.
These expectations will be different from person to person depending on your personality, your upbringing, and the standards you set for yourself.
External stressors are said to be those ‘forces’ applied to your life, such as significant changes at work, test anxiety, the way other people treat you, rising living costs, and demands from others on your time. In addition, you need to comply with authority and rules, pay bills, and do many things that you may not want to.
Are you one of the people that cope well with what life throws at you, or do you struggle with any form of pressure? Think about people you know. Those who seem to thrive when the demands are high always seem to take on more. Perhaps some even enjoy dangerous sports.
On the other hand, some people you know will always be flustered, struggle to get the most mundane things done, and moan about how stressful their life is.
How can you deal with the stressors in your life? How can you minimize their impact on you to a healthy level?
Three Simple Steps to Stress Reduction
- Accept What you Cannot Change
You cannot change other people’s behaviour, many situations, and what will happen to you. Learning to accept this helps alleviate a lot of stress as you know to let go and take life as it comes. How can you reduce your stress when so much of it is outside your control?
For example, you have to work to pay the bills, and the threat of redundancy is looming. This classic scenario brings on all sorts of problems for people. Can you do anything about it?
If there is genuinely nothing you can do about it, there is minimal point in worrying or ‘stressing’ about the situation. But, on the other hand, if you can do something to reduce your worry, then do it!
Another gloomier example is the threat of death. Do you worry about dying sometimes? Most people do at some point in their life. Yet there is little you can do about this. You can make sure you live as healthily as possible.
Regular exercise, sleeping correctly and keeping to a sensible diet. Once you have done everything within your control, you may as well stop worrying because it is now outside of your control. Let it go. Accept ‘what is and enjoy the time you’ve got!
- Change What You Can
As mentioned in the point above, you can reduce your stressors. You can change your attitude and behaviour to situations and things. Learn to see things in a balanced way. If you tend to be pessimistic, try to be a little more optimistic and see the opportunities that arise in mistakes and difficulties in your life.
The trick is to find and accept what is truly within your control and manage from there. So, for example, although other people’s behaviour is something you can do nothing about, you can choose how you react to it.
Initially, you may find this problematic as your reactions will have become automatic over time; however, you can learn to behave differently by thinking before acting and observing your behaviour. For example, when someone is being rude to you, consider that their rudeness is just a reflection of who they are, possibly their ignorance, unhappiness, or low esteem.
Whatever their reasons, you do not need to take offence. Let it go. Ignore it. Rising above it does not make you a victim, but it does empower you as you take control of your life and what is happening to you. You can also tell the person that their behaviour offends you and ask them not to do it again.
You will always have options, although they may be hard to find or take you out of your comfort zone.
- Be Good To Yourself
Can you genuinely say that you love yourself? Do you always forgive yourself for making mistakes? Guilt and feelings of low self-esteem can add to the pressure you can put on yourself.
Learn to love yourself and be a good friend to yourself. Don’t keep striving for perfection in everything you do. Listen to how you speak to yourself – do you constantly belittle yourself? Love yourself for the person you are. Be proud of your achievements.
In the same way, we need the effort to hold onto anything physically. By not forgiving someone, we expend energy. The worst case is when we refuse to forgive ourselves for things we have done or mistakes we have made.
Lying in bed at night wide awake while we relive things we have done wrong does nothing for your physical or mental health. Forgive yourself, let it go, and move on. You cannot change the past, so don’t waste time.
The prominent part of being good to yourself means taking care of yourself, eating and drinking sensibly, taking exercise, and getting enough sleep. Moderation is always a good key. Find time for socializing and doing things you enjoy. Get a good life balance that works for you within your limitations.